Time for a Change

A Recap of My- I Mean Jake's- Kindergarten Year

2011-04-21T22:42:00.000-07:00

Alternate Title: Why You Should Donate (Money and/or Time) to Great Public Schools

If you've read my blog for awhile now, you know that a year ago I was totally stressed out about where Jake was going to go for Kindergarten. I mean, there are many options in Los Angeles, it's so complicated to figure out the system, and in the end it sometimes boils down to little more than luck (read Magnets and Charters...). And because there's not really a standardized timing for when you are notified about school acceptances, you sometimes need to commit to one school before you've heard whether or not you have a spot at some of the other schools (read If you think...). But you probably also know that we somehow made it through that stressful time, and are now at a school that we love even more than we ever thought possible!

So, how did we get so very lucky to end up an amazing public school that we truly love, with a kindergarten teacher that we respect and adore, a principal that really listens to the children and their parents, and a group of families that are just as committed and involved as we could ever have hoped or expected? We won the lottery! And if that sound facetious or ridiculous, then you don't have a kid in Los Angeles.

You see, here in La-La Land, if parents don't want to send their kids to their neighborhood school, and they can't afford/don't want to send them to a private one (let's be honest, it's usually the money), then there are a few options. One is to find a charter school (or several), enter their admissions lottery, cross your fingers and hope for the best. So we did. Along with the other 10 schools we applied to, we picked a brand-new start-up charter practically across the street from our house. WISH Charter (isn't that an awesome name, even if it's a little tricky to clearly enunciate?) was originally planning to open in the Fall of 2009, but getting through the bureaucracy of LAUSD takes longer than you think, so it was put off until 2010. So we applied to this little school that had no track record, with a facility in serious need of remodeling, but a philosophy that was in line with our beliefs about what public school should look like. It was (originally) our back-up option in case nothing else worked out.

As it turns out, we ended up with a few options, a couple of them private schools. We weighed the pros and cons (the cost of private school being a huge con!), and decided to take a bit of a risk on the brand new public charter school. It was exciting to think that we'd be helping to build and shape this school as it grew. We went into it ready to volunteer our time, get involved and contribute our voices to WISH's community.

And get involved we did! It started with simply attending a meeting to help plan the summer mixer. Really, I just wanted to start getting to know some of the other parents and figure out how I could help. But everyone there was so excited to do that, and so much more- start building a school library, plant gardens, have shirts with the school logo, paint murals and beautify the school. Before long, there was talk about finding a hot lunch option and starting a recycling program. And the ideas honestly kept coming- but not just ideas, but people ready to make it happen! Did you know none of these things exist without the time and energy of many enthusiastic people to get it all off the ground?

If anyone had told me a year ago just how much work this would take, how much time and energy we would devote to this school... Well, I probably would have just brushed off their warnings, to be honest. I mean, people tell you how much work it is to have kids, and we still went forward with that- not just once, but twice.

So, what was my role in all of this? None of those things. And kind of all of it- we did all of it, and more! It started with a simple question about fundraising- how could we bring in some money to help support all of these amazing visions that the parents had for this school? I wanted to set up a few "passive" fundraisers- you know, the kind where you link your grocery card to the school so that a small percentage gets donated back each time you shop. And a few fundraisers at local restaurants- again, families attend and the restaurant donates a percentage back. And from there the ideas grew- fundraising events, grants, corporate sponsorships. We wanted to do so many great things for the school, but pretty much everything takes money, so we needed to find some ways to bring it in. And so I was put in charge of fundraising for the school.

So, how did we do? Pretty darn well, if I do say so myself. We (my fundraising committee and the school's parent association in general) set goals for ourselves. First, we wanted to bring in enough money (through events and passive fundraisers) to support our Arts, Music and PE programs at the school. As many other public schools are cutting these "extras," our goal was to always keep them fully integrated within the curriculum. By raising money to cover the costs of these specialists' salaries, program supplies and materials, it would take the burden off of the school to pay for them. We did a car wash (okay, we didn't wash the cars, but we partnered with a local business, got our cars washed, and got a nice donation to the school). We ate out at restaurants every month (such a chore, you know how I like to cook at home!). We put on a Holiday Boutique, raffles, a booksale, a silent auction and more. Our teachers even donated their time for fun activities with the kids that parents could bid on- Jake got to have breakfast at the beach with his kindergarten teacher and a few other students. We tried it all, and had lots of fun doing it. I'd like to think that all of our fundraisers did even more than bring in money, as we also bonded as a school community during these events. But bring in money we did- we have a couple more events before this school year is over, but it looks like we'll be able to fully cover the expenses of our thriving Arts, Music and PE programs.

Another fundraising goal was to obtain grants or sponsorships to help support getting new programs off the ground or subsidize what we had already started- the library or recycling program for example. This was a challenge as it turns out, and we learned that in this economy (aren't you tired of that phrase?) people are reluctant to put money into new schools with unproven track records. "We'll get 'em next year!" is my motto on that.

Our last fundraising goal was the biggest- to raise enough money from direct donations (i.e. people writing checks) to cover the budget deficit caused by the state pulling funds that the school had been relying upon during budget planning. At over $1000 per student, that left a big gap in the budget- about $140,000 in just this year alone. Did you know that charter schools generally receive less money per pupil than traditional public schools (estimates are between 22-40% less)? That they have less access to funds, and often have to pay a monthly rent until a suitable property is offered to them by the school district (as required by law)? It ain't easy being charter- you have big goals about how you want to do things differently than the traditional local schools, but less funds to do it with. We haven't hit our direct donations goal, but we did make a huge dent in it. If anyone knows a big donor looking for a cause, send them my way...

So, what's next in year two (aka first grade)? Bigger and better, of course. I recently accepted the position of co-president of WISH's parent association for next year. To be honest, I'm not sure yet what that looks like and what my role will be in regards to fundraising. But I do know that I am excited to be doing it at a school that continues to grow into everything I had hoped it would be.

Menu Planning, Two Weeks at a Time

2011-01-16T16:05:00.000-08:00

Breakfasts: Granola, fruit, yogurt, muffins. We have some blueberry, banana chocolate chip and cornbread muffins to eat up. Yummy!

Lunches: Leftovers. We have a bunch of things in the fridge from last week- chicken and rice, chicken burritos, dinners from Hangar 19 and Gladstones. And of course, there's almost always leftovers when I cook dinner since the kids rarely eat much of what I make. :(

As for dinner, here's the plan-
Sunday:

Chili (I made this at the beginning of last week, but forgot that the recipe makes twice as much as I can fit in my crock pot, so we're having it again!)
Cornbread muffins

Monday:

Pesto pasta with chicken (I'm going to base it off of this recipe and use pesto we picked up at the Farmer's Market.)
Steamed veggies

Tuesday:

Leftovers

Wednesday

Meatballs
Mashed potatoes

Thursday

Going out with my sweets

Friday

Leftovers

Saturday

Chicken salad on croissants

Sunday

Ribollita soup
Grilled cheese sandwiches

Monday

Leftovers

Tuesday

Pasta salad with chicken and veggies

Wednesday

Leftovers

Thursday

Chicken enchilada casserole

Friday

Leftovers

Saturday

Macaroni and cheese (looking for a yummy recipe... let me know if you have one!)
Green salad

I'm not ready for New Year's Resolutions...

2011-01-09T13:32:00.000-08:00

...Or maybe I am ready. I mean, I only have one: Finding Balance. It's not very specific, but certainly important considering how my year ended up (with me feeling like there wasn't nearly enough time for any of the things that I thought were important). I feel like I'm doing okay balancing so far, although we're only a week into the year.

But I think it's also important to revisit my goals from last year- the ones that I wrote when I started this blog back in March. It was Brody's birthday, which is quickly approaching again. My baby is going to be two soon! Before that anniversary, I figured I better check in to see how far I've gotten (or just how off track).

So here's my original list of what I wanted to change:

-Lose weight
-Have a more active lifestyle
-Cook food at home
-Eat healthier food (less fast food)
-Find a hobby
-Spend less money at Target
-Improve the world (volunteer)
-Drink less soda
-Use reusable bags
-Spend less time on the computer
-Stop reading emails, etc. while driving
-Let Chris know that I appreciate him
-Keep my car clean

The biggest success? I lost the weight that I wasn't sure I was ever going to lose. And more importantly, I've kept it off for several months and didn't even rebound during the holidays. Hurray! I'd like to say that I'm eating healthy and exercising and I've changed my whole life around to be far more healthy. I'd like to, but I can't. No, what really happened is I went on Weight Watchers, semi-starved myself for a few months, and then have tried not to binge-eat since then.

I think part of my problem was that I eat when I am stressed or bored, and at the time when I started this blog, I was stressed out about being pretty much a full-time stay at home mom to an infant (which also made me a little bored). Some stay at home moms are amazing at their job and think that's the best thing in the world. And I know that there are other moms who have to work full-time and just wish they had the option to stay at home. Neither of those are me. I need to work part-time in order to have a break from a life revolving around sleep schedules and breast feeding and dirty diapers.

Now that Brody has gotten a little older, life has gotten a little easier- no more breast feeding, and the sleep schedule (although certainly not perfect) is much, much better. Even potty training is on its way. And starting last fall, I was able to pick up a few more hours at work, which gives me less time for boredom (at the eating that goes with it). Which all adds up to a skinnier me! I mean, I'm certainly no super model, but I do feel much better after leaving behind that extra 25 pounds I've been carrying around for way too long.

And as for the other goals on my list? I don't think I was nearly as successful with those, although there was definitely at least some progress in each of them. There are a few that I am trying to revisit as this new year has begun- making time to cook at home for most meals (and therefore eating healthier and drinking less soda), spending less time on the computer (although hopefully blogging with a little more regularity since it helps to keep me sane), and having a more active lifestyle (I need to find at least one class at the gym that I can commit to on a weekly basis). I was doing all of these fairly well for awhile last summer, but then I got caught up in working more hours and volunteering at Jake's school and wasn't quite able to balance it all.

Time to start balancing...

Menu Planning... Starting Afresh in the New Year

2011-01-05T22:37:00.000-08:00

Okay, new year, time for new resolutions. This is my year of trying to find balance. I want to continue working, volunteering at Jake's school, being home with the kids... but I don't want to feel so stressed out trying to fit it all in. I need to revisit my goals from last year. Things were going pretty well until the school year started in the fall, and I no longer seemed to have enough time for everything. I stopped cooking, didn't make it to the Farmer's Markets to buy fresh produce, and our eating habits suffered. And I honestly don't remember the last time I made it to the gym. Miraculously, I haven't really put any weight back on (at least not yet), but now seems like a good time to get things back in line before they go quickly downhill.

Finding Balance. Not sure how to make it happen yet, but I do know that it all goes better when I plan everything out ahead of time. Maybe it's just the act of making the list itself that helps me feel more organized. So, here's my first list for 2011- meal plans for this week and next. Happy New Year!

Wednesday

French Dip Sandwiches and Sweet Potato Fries

Thursday

Meatloaf muffins and corn

Friday

Dinner out at the Food Trucks (First Friday in Westchester)

Saturday

Crowd Pleasing Chili and cornbread muffins

Sunday

Leftovers

Monday

Chicken and rice casserole with broccoli

Tuesday

Leftovers

Wednesday

Dinner out

Thursday

Soup and grilled cheese

Friday

Chicken burritos

Stress over the holidays? Naw...

2010-12-20T00:20:00.000-08:00

It's well after midnight and I've been lying in bed for at least half an hour, but it feels like much longer. I'm tired, but nowhere near falling asleep. Usually when this happens, there are about five dozen things that I am thinking about that absolutely positively need to be done ASAP, but I've decided that I need sleep even more than I need to get them done. Tonight, no such worries. Was it the Coke that I drank right before bed that is now keeping me up? Probably not since I've gone back to drinking way too much soda, and the caffeine is running through my veins at a pretty constant level.

I actually think I'm at a pretty good place right now in terms of my things-to-do list. My Christmas shopping is pretty much done, and almost all of the presents are even wrapped. I'm off from work for two weeks, and managed to get all of my reports done before leaving. Of course, there are some things that just didn't get done before I left Los Angeles with the boys to head home for the holidays (Chris will join us later). Like sweeping and mopping the floors so that the house would actually be clean when we return. Or writing my notes from work. Or our Christmas cards. I'm still hoping to get those done this week, though, even though I know it means many people probably won't actually receive them until after Christmas. Is that important? I don't know- it's something that I think really would have bothered me in the past. Which made me start thinking.

A friend that I hadn't seen in awhile was visiting recently during my absolutely most crazy busy week of this year. Which is saying a lot considering I feel like life has been pretty nonstop crazy since Jake started kindergarten this year. I was in the midst of organizing some continuing education courses for work, while juggling fundraising events and meetings at Jake's school, on top of my usual routine of work and caring for my kids. And on the first day of the series of three courses, it was pretty chaotic- the AV equipment wasn't doing what it was supposed to (even though I had checked everything out ahead of time, and it worked fine on the trial run), and the kids that were supposed to come for demos were calling out sick. Of course, everything was worked out, and the courses ended up going great. But I remember my friend asking about how I was doing it without appearing overly stressed. Basically, what she asked was, does having kids make you no longer "sweat the small stuff"?

The small stuff- like whether our Christmas cards arrive before or after Christmas? Whether or not my notes from September get finished by the end of the year? Whether over the holidays I put back on five of those 25 pounds I lost this year, and then have to work them back off when I get home? Are those the things keeping me up at night?

I don't know, I think there's just so much "stuff" that there's just not enough time to stress over all of it. I think having two kids and a busy schedule has helped me to learn how to multi-task even better than before. And how to prioritize. Like remembering to move our Elf on the Shelf to a new location for Jake to find in the morning. To put on the Phineas and Ferb Christmas CD and dance around the living room. To take the time to let Jake help wrap presents. His favorite part? Writing the "to" and "from" labels. But instead of just a simple label, he likes to write sentences on each package like, "I Love You. Jayden I hope You Have A Great Christmas. To Jayden Love Jake And Brody." All while slowly sounding out each word and confirming which letters spell what he's trying to say.

So no, I didn't really cross anything off my to-do list today. And I certainly wasn't a perfect mom making the most of every single moment. But all in all, I'd say that I am very much enjoying making some new holiday memories with my boys.

Saying Goodbye

2010-11-19T11:43:00.000-08:00

There are moments when I consider whether or not I really want to be a parent. Does this make me a bad mom? Like this morning... I don't know why Jake was having a hard time getting ready for school. I just know that everything turned into an argument, no matter what I said. Maybe he was still tired. Maybe he's coming down with whatever caused me to lose my voice last week. Or maybe he's just not a morning person. All I know is that it was a struggle for him to get dressed, eat breakfast, put on shoes and get out the door. And don't even get me started on finishing up the last of his homework from this week- that's a whole other post for me to write. I think I even breathed a sigh of relief as I drove off this morning and Chris took Jake to school.

And then I got some news on my way to work. Earlier, I received an email from a teacher at one of the schools where I provide physical therapy services. Call me ASAP was all it said. Curious, I called her on my way in to the clinic.

"I have to give you some bad news," she said. It was about one of the children that I treat at school twice a week. He passed away on Wednesday. It was a complete shock to everyone, including his family. He had had health issues in the past related to his metabolic disorder. And he was in the hospital now due to some difficulties with his medications. But earlier this week, we still thought he was being released and would be back at school before the end of the week. His teacher didn't know the details- his mom was of course pretty shaken up when she talked to her yesterday. The teacher promised to forward me the details about the funeral arrangements when she knew more.

I hung up in shock, and I think I'm still there. My heart is breaking for his family and everyone who knew and loved him. He was only four years old.

Please hold your children tight and tell them that you love them today. Everything else seems trivial.

Menu Planning... Trying to get back into the routine

2010-11-07T13:52:00.000-08:00

Last week was pretty good in that I managed to make dinner at home 5 out of 7 nights. Which was exactly what I planned for, so I'd call that a success! Especially since before that, I've been averaging only one to two meals a month cooked at home.

I learned from my friends on Facebook that maybe everyone else doesn't do as great of a job of cooking at home every night that I think they do. After my post about struggling to make dinner one night, some wrote that they were having pizza delivered, eating Chinese food, or having hot dogs at Target. And others had good suggestions to make it a little easier- crockpot cooking, making breakfast for dinner, having frozen pizza on hand, making soup/chili ahead of time, or using a meal planning website. Great suggestions! My go-to easy meal is usually something from the frozen section at Trader Joe's. They have yummy orange chicken, frozen meatballs (for sandwiches or to throw in pasta sauce), and lots of great frozen veggie combos. I recently sampled their frozen turkey meatloaf with mashed potatoes and ended up bringing those home, too (they're on the menu plan this week!). But for me, the biggest help is just planning ahead and then having the motivation to stick with it instead of having Chris pick something up on his way home from work.

The part that I really didn't do well last week was the exercise plan. I didn't make it to the gym at all. There's so much going on during the week that it's too hard to fit in exercise in the mornings. And then on the weekends, there's always something else with the family that takes priority. For now, I'm going to take that off my list, and just focus on getting back into the cooking routine. Here's the dinner plan for this week:

Sunday: Stuffed peppers (since I didn't find time to make them last week)
Monday: Meatloaf "muffins" with mashed potatoes
Tuesday: Spiral pasta with vodka sauce
Wednesday: Chicken burritos
Thursday: Leftovers
Friday: Italian pasta soup and grilled cheese
Saturday: We're going to be busy all day, so we'll go out or pick something up for dinner

As long as I can make it to the grocery store by Tuesday, I think I can make it happen!

Meals and Exercise... I just need a plan

2010-10-30T22:22:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow is Halloween. Which means that the end of the year is coming quickly. I love the holiday season, but it's always stressful- too much to do and not enough time.

I feel like I'm losing it lately. I find myself frustrated with the kids, annoyed that I'm not making time for exercising, and disappointed that I'm eating way too much unhealthy take-out food again. I know it's time to take a look back at my goals that I set for myself in March, but I'm afraid that I've slipped so far backwards that I'll feel like a failure.

I need to get back to blogging, because that was the one thing that made me accountable and helped me to stick to my plan. What changed that led me to stop blogging? Time. I picked up more hours at work, and at the same time I started volunteering at Jake's new school. A little bit in the classroom, but mostly with the parent organization supporting the school. My job: fundraising. Which is basically a full-time job in and of itself. The school needs money in order to get all of the programs off the ground that we want in our brand-new elementary: art, music, PE, library, garden, playground supplies, field trips, and a million other "extras" that no longer fit into the basic school budget. All of which are important, and all of which require money to get the programs up in running. If I'm going to lead the fundraising committee, I want to do it well. And that's one job where no matter how much time I devote to planning events, soliciting donations, writing grants, etc. etc. etc... there's always more that can be done.

I don't know if I can make the time to get back to blogging with any regularity. But I do know that if I don't do my menu planning, we end up eating out or picking up take out for almost every meal. So I'm going to try to start with that. And here's my plan for the week.

Breakfasts: Frozen waffles. I think we'll try to make to the Farmer's Market tomorrow morning to pick up some fruits so that we'll have some options.

Lunches: I'll have to see if I can make enough dinners to have leftovers available for lunches. Otherwise, I have some frozen meals stored up.

Sunday:

Dinner: Pre trick-or-treating meal with friends. Not sure what we'll have yet. (Edit: Pizza)
Exercise: ~~Pilates~~ Didn't make it

Monday:

Dinner: Chicken Salad (made ahead of time on Sunday)

Tuesday:

Dinner: ~~Stuffed Peppers~~ Chicken and Bacon Sub Sandwiches
Exercise: ~~Muscle strength class- trying out a new class at the gym~~ Didn't make it

Wednesday:

Dinner: French Dip Sandwiches with Sweet Potato Fries

Thursday:

Dinner: Grilled chicken and frozen veggies
Exercise: ~~Muscle strength class (if I liked it on Tuesday), or maybe just treadmill~~ Didn't make it

Friday:

Dinner: ~~Leftovers~~ Chris and I got a babysitter and went out to dinner

Saturday:

Dinner: Dinner out somewhere to celebrate eating in the rest of the week. Dude, if I actually cook dinner four nights in a row this week, it'll be a huge improvement over the last month or two. Edit: Leftovers.

Sunday: Daylight Savings Time Ends! And time to create another meal plan. Fingers crossed that I can stick with this one. :)

Somebody Please Stop Time, So That I Can Catch Up

2010-09-07T23:06:00.000-07:00

You may have noticed, I haven't been blogging much lately. (And if you haven't noticed, please don't tell me, you'll hurt my feelings.) It's been a month since I've posted anything at all, and two months since I posted anything much more than food/menu planning stuff. It's not that I haven't had anything to say, it's just that I haven't been able to figure out how to make time to write it. Don't know how to get back in the swing of things, but for now, this'll have to do. :)

Jake turned 5 last month. He had his last day of preschool a couple of weeks ago. And today he started Kindergarten. I realize in the grand scheme of things, this isn't really a big deal. Another birthday, another transition- he'll have many more of each. But for some reason, it feels like a pretty big deal. This is "real" school- no turning back now.

This was what Jake decided to wear to his preschool graduation. He might have been slightly overdressed, but man, what a cute kid.

And here is Jake, ready for school this morning. I'll spare you the later pictures of him, crying and clinging to mommy. Luckily, I was able to turn away so that he couldn't see my watery eyes (there were no pictures of that).

At the end of the day, he was smiling again and even said that he "sorta" liked it. My baby's growing up. One day down, 12-16 or more YEARS to go. Maybe I won't tell HIM that, just yet. I think I might just go cry myself to sleep now.

For posterity, here's Jake's account of the first day of school:

-Lined up, went to class. ("I cried a little in the morning. It was a new school and I was missing my old school. Some other kids cried a little, too.")

-Circle time- the teacher read The Kissing Hand and the kids put their nametags around their neck. Then they split into small groups to go through stations: Coloring and cutting out Chester the Raccoon from The Kissing Hand, Playdough (Jake made "a burrito and some spaghetti"), Making handprints with a heart-shaped sticker in the middle (their own kissing hand), and Reading books on your own.

-Snack time outside (Jake ate freeze dried strawberries), followed by a little play time on the small yard.

-Returned to class, another circle time. That may have been when Jake's teacher did a puppet show about Curious George and how he learns to "clean up his space." Or when the second teacher read It's Okay to Be Different. Or when the music teacher taught them about quarter notes and "one" notes (Jake sang "one" in different pitches for this. I have a feeling there was more to this, but the story got a little fuzzy around here.)

-Lunch happened sometime, too. Jake ate his goldfish. (Hey, I packed a sandwich and other things, but yes, that was all he ate for lunch.) Then more playtime on the small yard. Overall, I think he had a pretty good day. We'll see how tomorrow goes!

Menu Planning for the Week

2010-08-07T22:35:00.000-07:00

Last week was supposed to be a recovery period for me, after the crazy busy week before. Instead, I used the week for a preschool clean up day, working, a parent-teacher conference, a fundraising meeting, a treasury meeting, more working including consulting at monthly clinic, Jake's 5-year check up, a quick speech screening for Jake, swim class that was cancelled after we were already at the gym (somebody pooped in the pool- not my kid!), more working, and dentist appointments for Chris and me. Not much time to rest and relax. And sadly, I didn't manage to squeeze in any exercise, either. Part of the problem was that I had meetings and appointments during all of my regular exercise times. And the other part was that my normal workout buddy was out of town, so I wasn't motivated to make exercise a priority. But this week is a new week, so I'm going to try to get back into the routine.

Breakfasts: Chris has been awesome to finally eat up almost all of the cereal in the house. Which apparently motivated him to buy two more boxes. And I have some granola that I need to finish off in order to do my part. I think I saw some frozen waffles that Chris also bought (yep, he did some grocery shopping- such a helpful guy!), so we'll be eating those, too.

Lunches: I'll have to work to generate some leftovers for lunches this week. It's been a bit of a stretch the last two weeks as I haven't been making meals quite as regularly as I was in previous weeks.

Sunday:

Dinner: Pizzas from Fresh N Easy
Exercise: Pilates

Monday:

Dinner: Grilled steak, corn on the cob

Tuesday:

Dinner: Chicken Bacon Subs with sweet potato fries
Exercise: Spin class

Wednesday:

Dinner: Leftovers

Thursday: Jake's birthday!

Dinner: I need to talk to the birthday boy- we've invited friends over, so Jake and I will need to sit down and have a little menu planning session. Will report back later. :)
Exercise: Kickboxing

Food Waste Friday... Three Days Late

2010-08-02T21:31:00.000-07:00

It's Food Waste Friday (err, Monday, see The Frugal Girl for my inspiration), which means that it's time to post a picture of all of the food that I am throwing away this week. It's an effort to hold myself accountable for the food that I have wasted (while attempting to save money and do something better for the environment). View my first post on this topic to learn why this is important to me.

Turns out, I don't actually like the Cascadian Farms brand of raisin bran. I much prefer the good ol' fashioned Kellogg's Raisin Bran (two scoops!). I don't remember why- it was too bran-ny, not enough sugar on the raisins, or something like that, probably. All I know is, I got it, I tried one bowl, and I had a hard time making myself eat it again. I tried to pass it along to Chris, but even he didn't really want to eat it. So, it sat and it sat and it sat. And nobody ate it. And then Chris just tried a bite tonight and declared it inedible- soft, stale. Time to go! The good news, though, is that we did get through several other boxes of cereal without having to throw them out. We're now down to one box of granola with chocolate- what's not to like?

Meal and Exercise Plan

2010-07-25T22:16:00.000-07:00

I am not doing very well with sticking to my exercise plan. For the last couple of weeks, I have made it to only two out of the three classes at the gym, and haven't really been doing any walking or other exercise. And I'm not quite sure how to find the time to do more since I have been picking up more hours at work, in addition to my other commitments which are currently cutting into my "free" time (as if there is such a thing when you have kids). I'm not complaining, I'm just wondering if it's realistic to think that I will do some physical activity every day. Or maybe I should just really make sure that I make it to at least three classes at the gym each week and not worry about anything more than that. I'm gonna have to think on that one a little more. For now, I'll stick with my original plan and see if I do any better this week.

Breakfasts: CEREAL- we're not making much progress here. I bought frozen waffles last week because they were on sale, but was going to store them for another week until we got through some of the cereal first. But then I forgot to bring them in from the car, and they defrosted. I didn't want to refreeze them, so they were put in the fridge and had to be eaten sooner. But this week is the week that we're really going to eat cereal. I mean it.

Lunches: Leftovers.

Monday

Dinner: Shepherd's Pie (I have a frozen one from Trader Joe's that I think should finally get eaten) and canned pears (yep, still clearing out the pantry)
Exercise/outdoor time: Walk (mid-day)

Tuesday

Dinner: Fusilli alla Caprese with chicken breast strips from the freezer and canned corn (I have the corn and fusilli pasta in the cabinet)
Exercise/outdoor time: Spin class

Wednesday

Dinner: Leftovers
Exercise/outdoor time: Walk (evening)

Thursday

Dinner: Potato latkes (again, from the freezer) and feta, basil and cherry tomato omlettes
Exercise/outdoor time: Kickboxing class

Friday

Dinner: Out somewhere, anywhere. I have class all day, and will again tomorrow. No cooking for me.
Exercise/outdoor time: Walk (mid-day)

Saturday

Dinner: Steak and fresh veggies- whatever I find that looks good at the store. Celebrating finishing what will be a long, busy week.
Exercise/outdoor time: Walk (evening)

Sunday

Dinner: Leftovers
Exercise/outdoor time: Pilates

Pastetli

2010-07-23T14:59:00.000-07:00

I had a bunch of parsley that I needed to use up, so I looked online to find a good recipe. Parsley salad? Yuck. Couscous? Not for me. But I did find this recipe for Pastetli (which is a Swiss meat pie) that sounded interesting. I mean, the actual recipe is a bit confusing (some mushrooms, some white wine, some brown gravy mix? Just how much is some? Oh, I see later on, 1-2 (to) dl of wine. How much is a dl again? I don't do metric. And the recipe ends with "Set everything aside to finish the rest of the meal." Um, what? How do I finish it when you just ended the instructions right there?). Apparently, the recipe was provided by someone's mother-in-law who is Swiss and did the translating (from what language, I'm not sure. What do they speak in Switzerland? German? French? Italian? Romansh?). So, I used the "recipe" as a starting point, and modified it to work with what I had in the house. Puff pastry? No, of course not, but I did have a package of Pillsbury crescent rolls in the fridge that expired recently. Time to use it up before I have to log it as food waste! Anyhow, dinner turned out pretty well, so here's my version:

Pastetli (Makes 5 servings, 7 WW points each)

1/2 bunch of fresh parsley (I used almost a whole bunch and it was too much. But my parsley wasn't as fresh as it should have been, so you may want to use more than 1/2)
2 cups of mushrooms
1 lemon
2 chicken breasts
poultry seasoning (or paprika and garlic powder)
black pepper
1 small onion
3 cloves of garlic (I like garlic and don't believe there is such a thing as too much)
1 package of brown gravy mix
1 cup of water for the gravy mix (or white wine or half and half)
1 package of Pillsbury crescent rolls (or similar)

-Preheat oven to 375 degrees.

-Chop the parsley leaves (try not to get too many stems). Dice the mushrooms. Place parsley and mushrooms in a small bowl, add the juice from one lemon, stir and set aside.

-Dice the raw chicken breasts. Season with poultry seasoning and black pepper. Place in skillet with onion and garlic. Cook until lightly browned on all sides.

-Make brown gravy mix according to the directions. Or substitute white wine for water if desired, or half and half if you want a richer creamier taste. (I just used water.) Add gravy to the chicken mixture, and add parsley/mushroom mixture. Stir to combine everything.

-Unroll crescent roll dough into one large rectangle on an ungreased cookie sheet. Press into a 13x8 inch rectangle, firmly pressing the perforations and seams to seal (or you could actually buy the seamless dough sheet. Yes, they do make such a thing, who knew?).

-(Okay, confession: this part I didn't really do. I tried to make these into 5 little rolled up chicken things, and although they tasted good, it really wasn't pretty. There's a reason why there's no picture posted with this recipe. So here's what I would do if I made this recipe again.) With the long side of the rectangle placed vertically, spoon the chicken mixture into a 4-inch-wide strip down the center of rectangle. With scissors or sharp knife, make cuts 1 inch apart on long sides of dough rectangle to within 1/2 inch of chicken mixture. Fold strips of dough up over chicken mixture to meet in center; pinch to seal. (To make it even fancier, you can kinda criss-cross the strips of dough, and let the chicken mixture peek out the top. Totally up to you.)

-Bake 18 to 24 minutes or until golden brown. Remove from cookie sheet; cut into crosswise slices. Serve warm. Apparently, peas are a traditional side dish with pastetli. We just heated up some frozen mixed veggies. Yum!

Food Waste Friday... Almost Perfect

2010-07-23T13:27:00.000-07:00

It's Food Waste Friday (see The Frugal Girl for my inspiration), which means that it's time to post a picture of all of the food that I am throwing away this week. It's an effort to hold myself accountable for the food that I have wasted (while attempting to save money and do something better for the environment). View my first post on this topic to learn why this is important to me.

I was all set this morning to post about what a terrific job I did this week managing to have zero food waste, two weeks in a row! And I did do a terrific job using up the leftovers, celery, parsley, kalamata olives, and I've already forgotten what else, but it turns out it wasn't zero waste. But then I opened up the cabinet where we store Brody's baby food (which I actually don't use much since at 16-months old he eats almost anything now. Nice to have at least one kid who's not a super picky eater.). And I found tons of little black ants crawling everywhere. Ants, yuck! (You can kinda see them in the picture if you look closely and maybe squint.) So, I threw out all of the open snack-type foods. There really wasn't much, just banana crackers, some rice cereal (which he hasn't eaten in so long that he probably wasn't going to finish it anyhow), some teething biscuits, mini freeze dried fruits. Most everything was close to being finished already, so I am sorry to have to waste it, but it wasn't a lot, and not things that he's excited about eating anymore. But the good news is, finding the ants reminded me that I do still have some jars of baby food in the cabinet (sealed, of course, so totally ant-free). I guess I'll feed them to Brody, even though he hasn't had any baby food in quite a long time. But he does like feeding himself with a spoon, so I'm sure he'll enjoy them. Or at least have fun making a mess while trying.

Meal and Exercise Plan... Lotsa Leftovers and the Things I Didn't Make Last Week

2010-07-18T19:39:00.000-07:00

Last week, I didn't get to make everything that I had planned. Mostly for good reason, as I wanted to use up stuff that we had (and finally had a week with no food waste!). So, this week is all about making the stuff I planned to make last week, to use up stuff in the freezer and fridge.

Breakfasts: CEREAL (really!), yogurt, muffins we made over the weekend
Lunches: Leftovers. And Chris is going to be eating a lot of celery and peanut butter, otherwise we're never gonna finish off the celery.

Monday

Dinner: Leftover Chicken Salad on a bed of Romaine, Corn on the Cob
Exercise/outdoor time: ~~Walk (mid-day)~~

Tuesday

Dinner: Leftovers, again! (Chili and cornbread muffins)
Exercise/outdoor time: Spin class

Wednesday

Dinner: I'm modifying this recipe for Pastetli Pie to use up some crescent rolls and the parsley from last week. I have no idea if it'll be good, but I'm going to give it a try!
Exercise/outdoor time: ~~Walk (evening)~~

Thursday

Dinner: Chris and I have a meeting, and then are going to take advantage of having a babysitter by going out to dinner together.
Exercise/outdoor time: Kickboxing class

Friday

Dinner: ~~Peppery Potato Soup~~ ~~with homemade biscuits~~ We had some FANTASTIC friends offer to watch the boys, so Chris and I got to go out AGAIN! FUN!
Exercise/outdoor time: ~~Walk (mid-day)~~

Saturday

Dinner: ~~Simply Delicious Pork (pork chops with apples made in the crock pot) and frozen veggies~~ I used up some chicken breasts, potatoes, mushrooms, and a teriyaki marinade that's been in the fridge. Baked them all together, and it made for a pretty delicious meal.
Exercise/outdoor time: ~~Yoga or Farmer's Market~~

Sunday

Dinner: ~~Leftovers~~ Bumped from yesterday: Simply Delicious Pork (pork chops with apples made in the crock pot) and fresh steamed broccoli
Exercise/outdoor time: ~~Pilates~~ Beach

Food Waste Friday... The Very First Perfect Week!!!

2010-07-16T07:49:00.000-07:00

It's Food Waste Friday (see The Frugal Girl for my inspiration), which means that it's time to post all of the food that I am throwing away this week. It's an effort to hold myself accountable for the food that I have wasted (while attempting to save money and do something better for the environment). View my first post on this topic to learn why this is important.

Finally! No picture this week because no food waste! I don't think we did anything amazing this week to achieve this, but I have been packing some oddities in Chris's lunch lately to make sure that we get through everything. A not-so-fresh nectarine (I told Chris those should have been stored in the fridge), a big container of yogurt, a whole lot of celery (with peanut butter for dipping). The other day involved a small side of peas, which he initally considered rejecting. Instead, he ate them (cold) and reported they were actually quite tasty, to his surprise. Which makes me happy, because now I have a story to tell my five-year old Jake, the next time he tells me he doesn't like something before even taking a bite. "You do not like them. So you say. Try them! Try them! And you may. Try them and you may, I say." Okay, even that might not convince Jake to try green eggs and ham, but maybe a hotdog?

Just to be fair, packing things in Chris's lunch is not my only strategy for avoiding food waste. I also personally ate some strawberries that were starting to wither (not moldy, though), and tried to eat up other stuff. But mostly, I'm doing a better job of figuring out how to menu plan, be creative with foods, use up stuff that we have, and be flexible about meals. For example, I realized that I could hold off on cooking the pork chops with green apples, since those would keep a bit longer, and instead used up the red grapes and some of the celery in a yummy chicken salad.

Meanwhile, we have some serious work to do in order to get through everything else. Lots of parsley, celery, green grapes. (Perhaps the green stuff is less likely to get eaten? Or we just buy a lot of green foods?) I need to start menu planning for next week...

Peanut Butter Cookies

2010-07-10T19:24:00.000-07:00

I am reposting this recipe from Premeditated Leftovers because it's about the simplest dessert I could imagine. Cookies made with things I always have on hand- quick, easy, and they turned out yummy.

3 Ingredient Peanut Butter Cookies

1 large egg
1 cup sugar
1 cup peanut butter (smooth or chunky)
We added a handful of milk chocolate chips to about half the cookies, although I realize this totally destroys the 3-ingredient name

1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees and grease the cookie sheets.
2. In a mixing bowl, combine all the ingredients together until they are well blended.
3. Drop Tablespoon size balls on to the cookie sheet. Flatten the cookie dough with a fork.
4. Bake for 12 – 14 minutes or until golden brown. Place cookie sheet on a cooling rack for several minutes, then remove the cookies and let them finish cooling on the cookie rack. Makes 2 dozen.

Oh, and by the way, I used reduced fat Jif creamy peanut butter since that's what we happened to have in the cupboard. And I really couldn't tell the difference, so I would call that a success!

Meal and Exercise Plan... Staying on Track

2010-07-10T12:50:00.000-07:00

So, I've already mentioned (several times) that we went away for the long 4th of July holiday weekend. We left last Thursday night, and came back late Monday night. And those four days were a big part of the reason that I gained back 7 pounds over a week and a half. Seriously, SEVEN pounds. However, in the last four days that we've been home, I already lost four of those pounds. I don't think that's normal how my weight can fluctuate so much.

Anyhow, my point is, while I don't want to be obsessive about my weight, I also don't want to regain everything that I worked so hard to lose. So, I realize that I need to pay attention. And we can't eat out so often. Or eat my mom's delicious cooking too often. I'm not too worried about the type of food that I'll cook, just so long as I am cooking at home and eating reasonable portion sizes.

So, this week's focus in still on using up stuff in the freezer and fridge. (I'm happy to say that there's really not that much left.) And I've decided to combine that with some slow cooker recipes my mom found.

Breakfasts: CEREAL (we have six open boxes, it's time to get through some of them!), yogurt, fresh fruit (peaches, strawberries, plums, grapes, pineapple, apples), cherry chocolate chip bread from the Farmer's Market, banana nut bread

Lunches: leftovers, fresh fruit

Monday

Dinner: Herbed Artichoke Chicken ~~with corn on the cob~~ with rice (something needed to soak up all the sauce)
Exercise/outdoor time: ~~Walk (mid-day)~~

Tuesday

Dinner: ~~Simply Delicious Pork (pork chops with apples made in the crock pot) and frozen veggies~~ I used the leftover meatballs (and vodka marinara) from last week, along with half a box of uncooked mini penne to make a nice little pasta dish.
Exercise/outdoor time: Spin class

Wednesday

Dinner: ~~Peppery Potato Soup~~ ~~with homemade biscuits and a green salad~~ We ended up going to a last-minute meeting and just grabbed some fast food on the way home instead.
Exercise/outdoor time: ~~Walk (evening)~~

Thursday

Dinner: ~~Leftovers~~ Chicken Salad sandwiches on thin rolls (I bought some chicken super cheap, and originally planned to make this for lunch, but then decided it would be yummy for dinner and we'd just continue to have leftovers for lunches.)
Exercise/outdoor time: Kickboxing class

Friday

Dinner: ~~Chicken and Black Bean Quesadillas~~ I decided to modify slightly since Chris's parents are here, and turn it into Chicken Burritos with pico de gallo, Spanish rice, beans, guacamole (The last time I made this meat for tacos, it was so delicious! Oh, and I found some really great tortillas at Whole Foods by Tortillaland (yellow bag, refrigerator section). They're uncooked flour tortillas, that you just heat up for a minute in a frying pan. Yum!)
Exercise/outdoor time: ~~Walk (mid-day), probably to the grocery store and/or Trader Joe's~~ Cleaning- fast and furious, that counts for exercise, right? It was super hot here, so I was sweating!

Saturday

Dinner: Chris and I are going out while his parents watch the kids :)
Exercise/outdoor time: ~~Yoga? Farmer's Market? Beach clean up? Not sure what the plans are yet.~~ Park, walking

Sunday

Dinner: Crowd Pleasing Chili with cornbread ~~and a salad~~
Exercise/outdoor time: ~~Pilates~~ I forgot pilates class! I guess that's what happens when I stay out too late the night before. :) An evening walk with the family instead.

How to Make (Healthy and Delicious) Chicken Salad

2010-07-09T19:00:00.000-07:00

So, I found yet another blog that I absolutely love. This one is called Life as MOM, and it's written by Jessica Getskow Fisher (a.k.a. FishMama), who is the mom of six kids ranging from about 1-13 years old. (BTW, her first FOUR kids are ALL BOYS, which is precisely the reason that I will not continue to have another kid just to "try for a girl.") What I love about her blog is that she posts several times a day, and has all kinds of useful advice for a mom like me. She is a big proponent of "freezer cooking"- i.e., making food ahead of time and storing it in the freezer for quick and easy meals (which makes a lot of sense if you're feeding eight people, three meals per day). She does batch cooking once a month, throws it in the freezer, and then has her entire menu planned for the month. She also "hosts" frequent recipe swaps on her blog, most recently with recipes for cool foods.

So, from the cool foods recipe swap, I came across a blog from Anne at Quick & Easy, Cheap & Healthy. She shared how she makes a delicious chicken salad using yogurt instead of mayo, and various other ingredients depending on her tastes and what she has on hand at the time. Which means, it's a totally adaptable recipe that anyone can make, and the possibilities are practically endless.

Anyhow, here's Anne's recipe: She has the same "starters" every time: chicken (cubed or shredded, could be substituted with turkey, tuna, or hard boiled eggs), plain yogurt, dill relish (or small finely chopped pickle), and occasionally a splash or two of ranch dressing.
After those main ingredients, here's some possibilities that can be added in:
*celery
*dried cranberries or raisins
*grapes
*chopped or grated apples
*cucumber
*grated zucchini
*shredded or finely diced carrot
*walnuts, almonds or other nuts
*pumpkin or other seeds
*sweet peas
*fresh or dried herbs (parsley, basil, dill weed, etc.)
*spices (garlic salt, freshly ground pepper, etc.)
*possible toppings: lettuce, avocado, red onion, cheese, pickles
*can be served on lettuce, pita, sandwich bread, flat bread, as a wrap, with crackers

Chicken salad is one of my favorite things, but I've never made it before in my life. I'm not sure why- probably partially because I figured it wasn't very healthy for me, and partially because I didn't have a good recipe. But after reading Anne's blog, I figured I'd give it a try. So, here's a recipe for the chicken salad that I made.

Christy's Chicken Salad:

2 cooked chicken breasts, cut into chunks (I used leftovers from the night before that I had marinated in Italian dressing and then grilled)
4 ounces of vanilla yogurt (I would have used plain, but that's what was in the fridge. And it turned out to be really yummy)
Montreal chicken seasoning, reduced sodium (I use a lot of this seasoning- yum! But it's mostly a combo of garlic, onion, pepper and paprika)
Dill weed
Red grapes, halved
Dried cranberries
Roasted almonds, chopped (I would have used slivered, but again, this is what was on hand)

Of course, I should have taken a picture, but instead Chris and I just ate it all up before that occurred to me. But it was quite pretty with the colorful grapes and cranberries. And tasty!

What do you like in your chicken salad?

Grown Up Weekend

2010-07-09T13:30:00.000-07:00

Last weekend was fantastic. We drove to Phoenix with both kids in the car, leaving late so that they would hopefully both sleep in the car. It only half worked, and we got there totally exhausted, at 3:30am. Not sounding fantastic so far? We spent a good portion of the weekend helping my parents to clean out their fridge and pantry, and packing up everything in their kitchen cabinets to get ready for their kitchen remodel which began this week. Still not sounding fantastic? Oh, and did I mention that it was about 113 degrees in Phoenix?

But, when I say that the weekend was fantastic, I am not being sarcastic. Because, there was a part in the middle where we left the boys with my parents, and Chris and I had about 28 hours (but hey, who's counting?) all to ourselves. A Grown Up Weekend, as in, grown-ups only (no kids allowed).

Boy, do I love my kids. They are freaking adorable and hilarious, and my life is so much richer because they are a part of it. And I can say that now because I got to have some time to myself where I didn't worry about them at all. And honestly, I didn't miss them one bit.

Toward the end of last week, before we headed to Phoenix, I was hitting melt down mode. The kids were trying my patience at almost every single moment. I was yelling, threatening, giving time outs, and all of those things that I hate doing with my kids because I was at the end of my rope. But I didn't know what else to do.

So, we got to Phoenix, and Chris and I BOTH slept in while my mom watched the boys. Then we went to a movie that night after putting the boys down to bed. The next morning, we left my parents' house and Chris and I both got massages. Finally, I was relaxing. We ate lunch at a restaurant without a kid's menu. We drank champagne in the middle of the day. I took a bath. We went out to dinner and a baseball game, without wondering how long the kids would be able to sit still. We watched fireworks without having to cover the kids' ears. We stayed up late listening to a live band, without worrying about having to wake up with the kids the next morning. We slept in a dark hotel room until 10am. We went out to another restaurant that didn't serve chicken nuggets. And when we saw the boys again, I was able to actually enjoy being with them. We played together in the pool. Oh, and I got to see another movie after they went to bed that night, too.

It's almost enough to make me want to move back to Arizona, to be closer to our families. Not just for the free childcare, although it really came at a time that I needed it the most. But also getting to see how much the boys love being around all of their family, it's a really special thing. And we are lucky to live close enough that we see each other frequently, but even once every month or two can be a long wait in between.

Can someone just move Phoenix a little closer to Los Angeles?

Food Waste Friday- How Do You Use Up Your Condiments?

2010-07-09T12:44:00.000-07:00

It's Food Waste Friday (see The Frugal Girl for my inspiration), which means that it's time to post all of the food that I am throwing away this week. It's an effort to hold myself accountable for the food that I have wasted (while attempting to save money and do something better for the environment). See my first post on this topic to learn why this is important.

I could have had a perfect week, if I had chosen to ignore the condiments. But, as I spent last weekend helping to clear out my parents' fridge and pantry, and noticing how very long ago some of their stuff had expired, of course I had to check my own fridge. The worst offender: mustard that expired in 2008. Is it really bad? I don't know, but that was two years ago, so I think it's time to get rid of it. My problem is that we don't use a lot of condiments, so when I need a little something for a recipe, I'll buy the smallest/cheapest package, but we still can't get through them in time.

How do you use up all of your condiments before they've gone bad? Do you continue to use things that are past their expiration date? How far past?

Meal and Exercise Plan... Using Up the Stuff in the Fridge/Freezer/Cabinets

2010-07-05T17:00:00.000-07:00

We were out of town for the holiday weekend, so I'm picking up the menu and exercise planning a little late this week. But last week, I made it to all three of my scheduled classes at the gym! Yay, now on to the harder part: continuing with the schedule.

This week, I am trying to focus on using up the stuff that we have in the house already. Not the stuff that goes bad quickly, but the stuff that lingers around here forever. (If you saw my Food Waste post on Friday, you know just how long things can linger around here.) My family that I was visiting over the weekend will think that this was inspired by them, as we spent a good chunk of time cleaning out the fridge, freezer, cabinets and pantry at my parents' place to prepare for their kitchen remodel that starts this week. But I swear, this post was already planned before that. (Although, I will say, finding spices in the pantry that expired in 1990 did remind me of just how old I am. That was 20 years ago!) Anyhow, here's the plan for this week:

Breakfasts: yogurt, granola, fresh fruit

Lunches: leftovers, fresh fruit

Tuesday

Dinner: Trader Joe's Buffalo Burgers on Whole Grain Sandwich Thins, Baked Red Potatoes, Side Salad with Sweet and Tangy Dressing
Exercise/outdoor time: Spin class (and a walk in the evening to Trader Joe's)

Wednesday

Dinner: Grilled chicken and ~~Trader Joe's Organic Radiatore Pasta with Vodka Sauce~~ frozen veggie mixture
Exercise/outdoor time: ~~Walking (Farmer's Market?)~~ None. I have a hard time working it in on the days that I work.

Thursday

Dinner: ~~Leftovers (chicken and salad?)~~ Chicken salad made with extra chicken from last night.
Exercise/outdoor time: Kickboxing class

Friday

Dinner: Tito's Tacos- since it didn't happen the other week
Exercise/outdoor time: ~~Walking~~ House cleaning, does that count? I did it quickly enough to work up a little sweat. :)

Saturday

Dinner: Meatball sandwiches with Sweet Potato Fries
Exercise/outdoor time: ~~Yoga?~~ Farmer's Market

Sunday

Dinner: Dinner out somewhere with my sweetie (we have a babysitter!)
Exercise/outdoor time: Pilates, playdate at the park

Food Waste Friday... But I'm Not Taking the Blame for the Milk

2010-07-02T07:00:00.000-07:00

It's Food Waste Friday (see The Frugal Girl for my inspiration), which means that it's time to post all of the food that I am throwing away this week. It's an effort to hold myself accountable for the food that I have wasted (while attempting to save money and do something better for the environment). See my first post on this topic to learn why this is important.

This is bad... I thought we had a close-to-perfect week. And then I found these three steaks in the back of the freezer. They're from Dream Dinners, which is a place where you can go and do your meal prep, and take home some delicious, easy to put together meals. The problem is, I haven't been there in a very long time. If you look closely, the label says May 2007. Yes, those steaks have been in my freezer for MORE THAN THREE YEARS. They're well-sealed, but that just seems waaaaay to old. (Actually, this reminds me of an argument with a former roommate about when meat goes bad in the freezer. I don't remember how long it takes, but I know it was far less than three years.)

We almost wasted an avocado. Despite the fact that I am mildly allergic to them, and Jake refuses to eat them, and Brody only likes to mush them between his fingers, I bought one to serve with chicken tacos last week. I thought we were going to have guests in town, and it would be a nice addition. When I turned out to be just us, I honestly forgot about the avocado. Until I noticed it a couple of days later, and realized that it was extra, extra ripe. At that point, I was going to give it away, and had put it next to Jake's lunchbox so that we could bring it to school and ask which family wanted it. But then Jake noticed the avocado, and decided to play catch with it. Which I noticed after he dropped it (loudly) onto the floor. Figuring a slightly bruised avocado would still be okay to give away, I told him to put it back where he found it. Which I don't think he did, because a little while later, I found the same avocado in Brody's hands, along with some holes where he poked his fingers through the skin. That, I figured, would not be okay to give away, so instead it got packed in Chris's lunch to take with him to work. Yep, plain avocado, scooped out with a spoon. At least it didn't get wasted.

I did however dump some 2% milk down the drain. It still had three days left before the "Use By" date, but it was starting to look curdled and I am told that it didn't smell good. (Not being a big fan of milk myself, the idea of smelling possibly sour milk makes me nauseous, so I made Chris smell it instead. If Chris says it's bad, then it's definitely bad.) So, I wasted some milk. Sorry, cows, but I'm blaming the people stamping the "Use By" dates on the cartons.

Green Salad with Sweet and Tangy Dressing

2010-06-27T21:40:00.000-07:00

I made salad dressing! And, I liked it! Actually, the dressing wasn't anything fancy, since I picked a recipe that I could make with ingredients that I already had in the house. (In the future, I think I might try out a poppy seed dressing, but I honestly don't even know where in a grocery store you find poppy seeds. With the spices?)

Here's the salad that I made, which was modified from one I found on allrecipes.com.

Green Salad with Sweet and Tangy Dressing

(approximately 4 Weight Watchers points per serving)

Lettuce: I used a mixture of baby spinach and romaine
Feta cheese
Grape Tomatoes (these were just for Chris- I don't eat raw tomatoes)
Other good additions/substitutions for next time would be dried cranberries or crumbled bacon

Dressing:

1/3 cup extra virgin olive oil
3 tablespoons sugar
2 tablespoons red wine or balsamic vinegar (I used red wine vinegar)
1 tablespoon sour cream (I used light)
1/2 teaspoon Dijon mustard
You can add fresh herbs, grated Parmesan or freshly ground pepper if you like

Combine salad dressing ingredients in a jar with a tight fitting lid. Shake well to combine, then drizzle over salad. Unused dressing can be stored in the fridge for about a week or so.

By the way, here's my jar with a tightly fitting lid. A baby bottle. Hmm, maybe I could invest in an actual salad dressing bottle someday, so that it would look more like the picture at the top.

Meal and Exercise Plan... Trying to Make it Back to the Gym

2010-06-26T09:00:00.000-07:00

I don't know if this helps anyone else, but since it helps me, I'm continuing with the weekly menu and exercise plan. If you want to see how close I keep to my plan, you can just check back on the previous posts here or here. I've crossed out anything that I didn't follow through with, and added what I did instead. Yes, there's a lot that gets crossed out. Especially the exercise parts. I really do want to get better use out of my gym membership, but making it there always seems to be the lowest priority. I'll keep trying...

In case you were wondering, we eat a lot of leftovers because I tend to follow recipes as written, which generally yields at least six to eight servings. Chris and I only eat two of those servings at a time, Jake rarely eats more than a bite, and Brody only eats a small portion of my meal. So, that leaves lots of leftovers- not just for lunches, but also for a second dinner most of the time. I'm still not a huge fan of having leftovers for dinner (although I do enjoy it at lunchtime). But I am a big fan of not having to shop quite as often, or cook every single night, so leftovers it is.

Oh, and I still have more crock pot recipes to try out, so more of those this week.

Breakfasts: cereal, yogurt, granola, fresh fruit (red grapes, plums, yellow cherries, strawberries, bananas). I also want to try more recipes from a preschool cookbook we borrowed from the library, Pretend Soup and Other Real Recipes, especially Hide N Seek Muffins (with a strawberry in the middle), and maybe those blueberry pancakes that I didn't get to last week (if I pick up some more blueberries).We've already tried a few of the other recipes in this book, and I highly recommend it if you have young ones that like to cook with you. It's got the recipes written out, but then also a picture version for the kids to follow. Super cute, and fun.

Lunches: leftovers, fresh fruit

Saturday

Dinner: Pork chops, baby red potatoes, green salad
Exercise/outdoor time: ~~Yoga class~~ Swimming

Sunday

Dinner: Spaghetti with Puttanesca Sauce, whole wheat french bread and a side salad (spinach mixture, feta, dried cranberries)
Exercise/outdoor time: Pilates class (we also went to the park and I did some gardening)

Monday

Dinner: Chris will be at work, I'll be eating leftovers
Exercise/outdoor time: ~~Walking~~ None :(

Tuesday

Dinner: Leftovers
Exercise/outdoor time: Spin class

Wednesday

Dinner: Crowd-Pleasing Chili and cornbread
Exercise/outdoor time: Walking

Thursday

Dinner: ~~leftovers~~ Chipotle in the car on our way to Phoenix
Exercise/outdoor time: Kickboxing class

Friday

Dinner: ~~leftovers~~ Mom's spaghetti- YUM!
Exercise/outdoor time: ~~Walking~~ None :( But does it count that I was still sore from kickboxing?

Food Waste Friday... It Could Have Been Worse

2010-06-25T07:00:00.000-07:00

If Fiber Makes You Gassy, Please Keep It To Yourself

2010-06-23T22:59:00.000-07:00

I was reading the latest post from the Creative Junkie (Andrea Chamberlain), who recently lost 40 pounds while on Weight Watchers. Which inspired me to write about some of the things that I have been eating that have helped me lose 25 pounds (slightly less remarkable than her total, but still no tiny feat).

I should make a disclaimer first. To be honest, my weight loss wasn't really so much about what I ate, but more about what I DIDN'T eat. What I mean to say is, of course I (mostly) cut out the obvious high-calorie, not so healthy stuff like potato ships, ice cream, soda, and baked goods. And I tried to cook at home, making healthier meals with more vegetables and fruit. But mostly, I ate real food while maintaining some serious portion control (i.e. staying within my allotted Weight Watchers points).

With that being said, I know I have been posting recipes for meals here, but I think it might be helpful to list some of the snacks I have been eating while trying to lose weight. Oh, and don't expect me to be half as funny as the above-referenced post; Andrea is inappropriate and totally hilarious. But, here goes.

First, I did not drink a butt-load of water, as so many others profess to do when dieting. (By the way, I still dislike the idea of dieting, or at least calling it a diet. But, having spent the last three months on Weight Watchers and trying to live on only 19-21 points per day (my allotment went down as I lost weight), I must admit that I was sometimes hungry, and I cannot deny that I was dieting. But, as usual, I digress.) I realize that water is a healthy drink, and for some people, it may help them to feel less hungry. For me, it just helps me to feel bloated, which is not a pleasant state to be in. Besides, if you read this article, it talks about a review published in the American Journal of Physiology that found no evidence that people need to drink the often-recommended eight glasses of water per day. In fact, it dispels several myths, like "by the time you're thirsty, you're already dehydrated," "dark urine means dehydration," and "coffee, tea and soda don't count towards your hydration requirement." None of those appears to be true. Realistically, my 19-point daily allotment didn't give me much room to drink beverages with a points value. So yes, I cut out almost all other drinks besides water, and yes by default I ended up drinking slightly more water. But really, not so much.

I did, however, drink some diet drinks. I have always HATED diet soda and thought that if I had to resort to drinking diet, then it wouldn't be worth drinking soda at all. Which I still mostly agree with. But sometimes, you just need something other than water. Cue the Coca-Cola Zero Cherry. I think Coke Zero tastes the most like regular soda of any diet drink. No, it's not quite the same, and it tastes kind of flat in comparison. But the cherry flavor is the most drinkable diet I have tasted. How's that for a half-hearted endorsement? More recently, I have also started drinking some of the Sobe Lifewater Zero drinks, and I am definitely not in love with them, but they don't have the same gross STRONG artificial sweetener taste that most diet drinks do. And hey, a zero points pick-me-up is sometimes just what one needs to get through the day.

Nabisco 100 calorie snacks Mr. Salty Milk Chocolate Covered Pretzels. A delicious mix of sweet and salty, each of the 6 packs per box gives you just enough pretzels to satisfy the snacking urge. For just two Weight Watchers points, I get a delicious afternoon pick-me-up to keep me from turning into a starving, angry bitch before dinner. But they're apparently not for everyone, since Jake (who loves both pretzels and chocolate) won't touch them. Yay, more for me!

Reduced Fat Wheat Thins (Original, French Onion, or Garlic and Herbs). Are they as good as the regular ones? I have no idea. As far as I'm concerned, crackers are just a crunchy vessel for things that you want to dip them in- egg salad, soup, hummus. These ones taste fine, and you get 16 crackers for just two points.

Fiber One Bars Oats and Chocolate. The way that Weight Watchers calculates points involves some formula that takes into account the number of calories and grams of fat (more = more points), and the grams of fiber (more fiber = less points). No, the Fiber One bars aren't so yummy that I would eat them if I wasn't dieting, but at just two points each, they could fill me up for awhile. And for someone that never used to eat breakfast at all, they made an okay morning meal that I didn't get tired of eating everyday. Along the same line of adding more fiber to my diet, I found that it was super easy to switch to whole grain pasta and brown rice instead of white. Add more fiber, fill up your tummy, and bring down the Weight Watchers points values. It's win-win-win. But if too much fiber makes you gassy, then I can't help you there. Maybe not a win for everyone, after all.

Watchers Ice Cream Candy Bar. I suppose they can't call these Snickers bars for obvious reasons, but it's pretty much what they are. Made with a reduced fat ice cream substitute, of course, but so yummy that I could eat several a day. However, since they are three Weight Watchers points each (and not cheap, by the way), I can't really eat several a day, however much I would like to. These are a snack that I would eat even when not dieting. Some people also swear by Skinny Cow desserts (single-serve ice creams, sandwiches, cones, bars), and I tried several of those. They were surprisingly better than I expected, but in my mind don't hold a candle to the Ice Cream Candy Bar.

Unfortunately, I have to report that I never did not find a magic salad dressing, i.e. a low-fat, low-calorie delicious concoction that would make lettuce actually taste good. Although I tried several light dressings from Newman's Own (Balsamic Vinaigrette, Italian), a couple of different fat-free ranch dressings, and even Salad Spritzers (which taste like very watered-down salad dressing), at best they were just tolerable. My tastes run towards a full-calorie ranch dressing, but since those can be five to seven points for a two-tablespoons serving, I may never eat ranch again. So, I'm still in search of the perfect salad dressing, although I currently have about seven imperfect options in the fridge.

Now, I realize that most of this stuff goes against the advice of Michael Pollan's Food Rules (read my previous post for a review of sorts). Diet soda, reduced-fat foods, and anything that is artificially sweetened would be hard pressed to be counted as a "real food." Yes, I should be increasing the amount of fresh fruits and veggies in my diet, and I have. Significantly. In fact, one of my most frequent snacks was five baby carrots and/or a quarter of an apple at a time (which is the most you can eat and still count it as zero points. Cheating? Maybe.) But it's hard to change my junk food-loving ways. Baby steps.

I may just be taking myself too seriously

2010-06-20T22:08:00.000-07:00

I borrowed a book from the library, Blogging for Dummies, just to see what I could learn. No, I don't kid myself into thinking I could make a career out of this blogging thing. But I do find it amazing the wide array of crazy things you can borrow (for free!) from the library at any given time (in addition to the blogging book, I currently have at home a crock pot cookbook, Spanish cd's, preschooler books and many more). So I spontaneously grabbed this one off the shelf last week.

Anyhow, skimming the book didn't teach me a whole lot, but I did finally figure out how I could allow readers to sign up to have an email sent to their inbox when I post new content. You know, for those of you who feel that subscribing to a reader is useless because you still have to check there. I added it to the sidebar, but just in case that's not obvious enough, you can also click here: Subscribe to Time for a Change by Email.

Okay, enough of my self-promotion moment.

Again with the TMI

2010-06-20T16:00:00.000-07:00

Those of you who read my previous post, Maybe Not Unthinkable, But Defnitely Unpleasant, know that I recently found out that it's time to strengthen my pelvic floor! In keeping with my full-disclosure policy so far, I figured I'd add one more thing to my "list" of stuff to fix. So, here it is.

My kegel exercise plan is to do a set of 10 (work up to holding each one for 10 seconds) when:

Brushing my teeth (standing up)
At red lights (sitting)
In bed, just before getting up in the morning and going to sleep at night (laying down)

Okay, now the hard part is sticking with it long enough to see some results...

Weekly Meal and Exercise Plan...the Crock Pot Edition!

2010-06-19T12:00:00.000-07:00

I think my menu and exercise planning last week did help with keeping me on target (or at least close), though I didn't stick with it as well as I had hoped. So I think I'll try it again... This week: using the crock pot!

Sunday

Breakfast: We'll go out somewhere for Father's Day, probably to the Coffee Co
Lunch: Hot dogs at Dodger's Stadium for Father's Day Catch, and we'll bring some healthy snacks
Dinner: Chicken and Vegetable Tortellini Stew- trying out a new recipe from the Betty Crocker More Slow Cooker Recipes book that I borrowed from the library. And we'll try grilling some beautiful baby artichokes that we picked up at the Farmer's Market.
Exercise/outdoor time: Playing catch at the ballpark, and maybe a trip to and Pasadena for the Chalk Festival

Weekday Breakfasts: cereal, yogurt, granola, fresh fruit (cherries, white nectarines, yellow peaches, blueberries, apples) and whole wheat raisin bread from the Farmer's Market. If I'm feeling adventurous, we might make the bread into french toast one day, or maybe make blueberry pancakes.

Weekday Lunches: leftovers, fresh fruit

Monday

Dinner: Chicken-Wild Rice Casserole with Dried Cherries, also from Betty Crocker
Exercise/outdoor time: ~~Stretch class or workout at the gym~~ Walk through the wetlands

Tuesday

Dinner: leftovers
Exercise/outdoor time: ~~Walking with the baby in the stroller- maybe we should head to the beach and walk along the jetty?~~ Some sit-ups and push-ups at home. Better than nothing, right?

Wednesday

Dinner: French Dip Sandwiches ~~with Sweet Potato Fries~~ and frozen rice/veggies mixture, since we didn't get to them last week
Exercise/outdoor time: ~~Stretch class or workout at the gym~~ Gardening- it needed to be done

Thursday

Dinner: leftovers
Exercise/outdoor time: ~~Walking with the baby in the stroller~~ More gardening. The front yard is looking much nicer. :)

Friday

Dinner: ~~Pork Chops and Red Potatoes~~ ~~made in the crock pot~~ I never made it to the grocery store to pick up Lipton soup mix for the pork chops, so instead I made a recipe that I was planning for next week: Chicken Tacos made in the crock pot, refried black beans, Spanish rice with black olives. Turned out to be really delicious.
Exercise/outdoor time: ~~Kickboxing or Muscle Strength class, depending on what time I make it to the gym~~ None, really, I was trying to get the house cleaned. :(

Saturday

Lunch: ~~Tito's Tacos!~~ Leftover taco/burritos
Dinner: ~~probably leftovers, depending on what's left~~ Pork Chops and Red Potatoes made in the crock pot, with a green salad
Exercise/outdoor time: Yoga class

Sunday

Exercise/outdoor time: ~~Yoga class if I miss it on Saturday. Zoo tour? We should be getting the most out of our membership before it gets ridiculously hot this summer.~~ Pilates class.

Turning Food Waste Into Cupcakes (Tastes Better Than It Sounds)

2010-06-18T10:06:00.000-07:00

It's Food Waste Friday (see The Frugal Girl for my inspiration), which means that it's time to post all of the food that I am tossing for the week, in an effort to document and hold myself accountable for the food that I have wasted (while attempting to save money and do something better for the environment).

This week: 1) a small box of animal crackers that I found in the back of the cabinet (which is why they didn't get eaten; they were lost in there). I don't know how long they were there, but they were so soft that they fell apart when touched, so I'm guessing quite awhile; and 2) a half of a container of deli-style sliced chicken that I found in the back of the cheese drawer, which is why it didn't get eaten. And how I didn't notice before it became this moldy is kind of surprising since I have been clearing out my fridge weekly. I guess chicken doesn't last as long as I thought.

As for the impending frosting disaster? Crisis averted. I tried, as suggested, to use up the large amount of leftover frosting by spreading it on graham crackers for dessert. It was yummy, but we don't really have dessert that often, so we kind of forgot about it after eating it once. So, instead I decided to use Frugal Girl's chocolate cake recipe, once again, but made them into cupcakes this time (and a few mini-cupcakes, too). My thought was that we would save some for Father's Day, and Chris could bring the rest to work so that they would get eaten. However, I decided to make them without cupcake liners because a) we didn't have any, and b) I figured it was better for the environment, anyhow instead of wasting the (what I thought would be) unneccessary paper. So I greased up the muffin tins, baked them at a slightly lower temperature for a much shorter cooking time, and then let them sit in the pan after removing from the oven. But, the cupcakes still stuck to the bottom of the tin. So I pried as much of them as I could out of the muffin tins, and realized that the bottoms were so crumbly that they would fall apart if decorated as regular cupcakes. Instead, I turned them upside down and put the frosting on the bottom of each cupcake. And sprinkled a few chocolate chips on top. Not a pretty sight, but still very yummy.

I actually don't think the picture does the cupcakes justice for just how unattractive they are. You'll just have to trust me on this, I guess. Enough so that I would have been embarrassed to send them to work with Chris, so instead we will have to eat them all ourselves. Oh, the sacrafices which must be made to avoid food waste. I should note, however, that the mini-cupcakes all came out of their nonstick mini muffin pan pretty easily, and were especially cute when frosted and chocolate chipped. However, I don't have a picture of those because we already ate them all up.

Maybe Not Unthinkable, But Definitely Unpleasant

2010-06-17T16:01:00.000-07:00

I went to a kickboxing class at the YMCA this morning. That makes two days in a row that I put Brody into Child Watch and got a workout. Yay, me. Which probably means that I won't go again for the next six months. (At least, that's how it usually works.) But I do fully intend to keep this up...

Let me back up. Since I started Weight Watchers three months ago, I have lost almost 25 pounds and made it down to my goal weight. Yay, me! I am back below where I was before getting pregnant with Jake. I weigh what my driver's license says I weigh! I kinda thought that was never going to happen. Really, when I set that goal weight, I never thought I was actually going to reach it.

I ditched my everyday jeans awhile ago, and went down to my thinner ones. They're currently being held up by a belt, but it ain't pretty. So, I ordered some new jeans from Gap online (I love my Long and Leans, and I use our Gap Visa card for almost all of our purchases so that I can earn rewards points to spend at Gap. And if I order online, it lets me combine promotions, which they don't let me do in the store, so the jeans ended up costing me almost nothing.) Anyhow, before I digress into a full-on Gap commercial, let me tell you that I ordered the jeans in the next size down, and they arrived in the mail yesterday. And I think they're still too big.

All good news (well, except that I had to go back to the store and try to exchange my jeans). So I went to Gap to try on the jeans, and found that the next size down really did fit better. Feeling crazy, I decided to try the next size down from there. They were too small. I could button them, though, which was a nice surprise, but clearly they were not the size that I should be wearing, which I was totally okay with. So, apparently, I wear precisely half the size I used to wear, or half the size of the jeans that I squeezed into on my "skinny" days. (I am going back and forth as to whether or not I should just write what size this is, but I think I'm gonna stick with "not" in order to avoid alienating any people that fit into one of two groups: a) those that will read it and think, "She only wears a size X? That skinny bitch has no right to complain about anything!" and b) those that will think, "She still wears a size X? And she thinks that she should look good in a swimsuit?")

Which brings me to what happened next: I decided to try on a swimsuit. I must have been feeling cocky about my jean size (I know it's just a number, but it was such a nice, low number!). I say cocky because I have always, always hated swimsuit shopping; it's one of the worst things that a female has to experience. In the past, I have gone into fitting rooms with a dozen or more swimsuits, only to eventually emerge with maybe one that didn't make me want to kill myself. On a really good day. I don't know what possessed me to try it on a swimsuit on this day, but I did.

I fully expected to be less-than-thrilled about my nowhere-near-flat stomach. I've had two babies, and I am beginning to accept the fact that my stomach may never recover, no matter what I weigh. I'm trying to accept it, so I found a black (dark colors make you look smaller) tankini (to hide the tummy) that looked super cute on the hanger. And I picked out a larger size in the bottom than the top, because I was trying to be realistic. And it fit. But it made me want to cry. My bruised legs (I don't know why I bruise SO easily, but I do), my not-smooth thighs, my butt chunks hanging out of the swimsuit (Jake coined the term "butt chunks" and I still like it better than butt cheeks). And I have no boobs. Seriously, of the 25 pounds that I lost, I think 10 of them came from my boobs. And those of you that know me, know that my boobs never weighed 10 pounds, even during the pregnancy or breast feeding stages. So, they currently weigh about negative five pounds, give or take.

Needless to say, I did not buy the swimsuit. I tried not to sink into a depression because I really, really don't want to have body image issues. I just want to go back to being very happy about all the weight that I lost and how much better I'm looking in regular clothes. Or even nude. Just not in a swimsuit, apparently.

So I got to thinking. Is this really as good as it gets for me? I'm not getting any younger, and I have had two kids. I don't really want to lose any more weight, and in fact, Weight Watchers won't let me lose more than a couple more pounds before I would be considered "unhealthy" for my height. I know that I haven't been going to the gym, but I have been walking much more (while pushing a stroller, or even some days a double stroller with more than 40 pounds in it). I went through a period where I was exercising pretty regularly at home- sit ups, push ups, leg lifts, stretching, etc.- although I have kind of let that fall by the wayside over the last few weeks. And I'm eating much healthier. So I should be much healthier, right? And more physically fit?

Well, I decided that I needed to make it over the next hurdle, and actually head to the gym to find out. Yesterday, I spent some time on the stationary bike and then the elliptical machine. (BTW- Brody did not love being in the Child Watch program, but he tolerated it, well enough that I figured I could head back the next day.) I felt really good after exercising, and was experiencing an endorphin high well into the afternoon. But I was starving. Seriously, I only earned a few WW activity points by exercising, but I think I ate an extra 10. Kind of works against the goal of maintaining my current weight, but whatever. Maybe I just need to workout more regularly to get used to it.

Today, I decided to be even more adventurous and return to the kickboxing class that kicked my butt the last time I went, which was almost exactly a year ago. The one that is led by an ex-Marine who apparently NEVER tires. And I learned a few things about myself. I am really not in any better shape than I was a year ago. THAT was a huge disappointment. And, there are some things about my body that have not recovered from pregnancy. For those of you that have not given birth to two children vaginally, this may be TMI. But I know that some of you will understand when I say that I cannot do jumping jacks without peeing my pants. THAT was a surprise, and not a pleasant one. But, I figure it could be worse (if you don't believe me, check out this hilarious but slightly depressing post from another mom, And Then The Unthinkable Happened).

So, what does this mean? It means that, although I have reached what I thought was the magic number on the scale, I haven't actually met my goal of being fit, healthy, and satisfied with how I look in a swimsuit. It means that I have more work to do. And I'm okay with that, because I know that I'm still working on establishing more healthy habits that make my feel good about myself. (Even if I'm not okay with peeing my pants.)

Menu Planning... Better Late Than Never

2010-06-15T21:05:00.000-07:00

Okay, I'm trying something new here. Maybe I can plan ahead a little better and have a menu ready for the entire week, instead of trying to figure it out one day at a time. And if I include a plan for exercise, maybe I'll actually follow through. Will it make me more organized, require fewer trips to the grocery store, and get me to go to the gym? We shall see. Yes, I realize it's already Tuesday, but I'm trying, okay?

Menu Planning:

Breakfasts: Banana Chocolate Chip Muffins, vanilla yogurt, granola, fresh fruit
Lunches: Leftovers, fresh fruit (peaches, cherries, apples, nectarines, strawberries, bananas)

Sunday

Ribollita Light Soup
Grilled cheese (sourdough bread and mozarella)
Exercise/outdoor time: ~~Zoo~~ We actually ended up hanging out in South Pasadena

Monday

Chicken and Bok Choy stir fry with brown rice
Exercise/outdoor time: ? Actually, none :( Spent the day at work, instead.

Tuesday

Chicken Enchilada Casserole
Green salad
Exercise/outdoor time: Walk to Trader Joe's and the grocery store

Wednesday

Chris has a work function, so I think I'll just have leftovers
Exercise/outdoor time: YMCA ~~(stretch class? or maybe the elliptical?)~~ stationary bike and elliptical

Thursday

Cheesy Italian Penne Shepherd's Pie
~~Green salad~~ So tired of salad- I don't like any of the six salad dressings in the fridge
Exercise/outdoor time: YMCA (kickboxing ~~or pilates class, depending on what time I make it there~~)

Friday

~~Leftovers (probably Shepherd's Pie)~~ Chris came home early and we went out to BJ's Brewhouse- YUM!
Exercise/outdoor time: ~~Walk with Brody and Delaney in the double stroller to... ?~~ Sadly, no walk as the babies ended up having opposite nap schedules, but we did spend a little time outside in the backyard. And we went to Target after dinner and parked really far away, does that count as exercise? (Still sore from kickboxing class yesterday)

Saturday

Maybe leftovers~~, maybe eat out, or if we're home, maybe~~ ~~French Dip Sandwiches~~ ~~with Sweet Potato Fries (but I'll have to make another trip to Trader Joe's first)~~
Exercise/outdoor time: Pacific Beach clean up in the AM, park playdate in the PM

Sunday is Father's Day... need to come up with some ideas...

Chicken and Bok Choy Stir Fry

2010-06-14T22:38:00.000-07:00

Chicken and Bok Choy Stir Fry
Serves 4 (Weight Watchers- 6 points per serving)
Total Time: 25m

This recipe is modified from the Real Simple website, mostly to add more veggies that I picked up from the Farmer's Market. I suppose one could argue that it's really not an authentic Chinese recipe if it's using a store-bought BBQ sauce, but it's simple, and made from stuff that I have on-hand. And besides, it's yummy.

Ingredients:

2 cups of cooked brown rice
1 tablespoon olive oil
3 six-ounce boneless, skinless chicken breasts, cut into 1-inch pieces
salt and black pepper
2 carrots, chopped
2 celery stalks, chopped
2 cloves garlic, minced
1/4 cup chicken broth
4 heads baby bok choy, roughly chopped
1/4 cup low-sodium soy sauce
1/4 cup store-bought barbecue sauce
1 teaspoon sugar
4 scallions, thinly sliced

Directions

1. Cook the rice according to the package directions. (Trader Joe's has an Organic Brown Rice in their freezer section that cooks deliciously in the microwave in just 3 minutes.)

2. Meanwhile, heat the oil in a large skillet (or wok) over medium-high heat. Season the chicken with salt and pepper and cook, tossing occasionally, until browned and cooked through, about 5 minutes. Transfer to a plate.

3. Add carrots, celery and garlic to the skillet. Cook long enough to soften the vegetables, about 5 minutes. Add the bok choy and chicken broth. Cover and cook until the bok choy is just tender, about 3 minutes.

4. In a small bowl, combine the soy sauce, barbecue sauce, sugar and scallions. Add to the skillet and bring to a boil. Return the chicken to the skillet and cook, tossing, just until heated through, 1 to 2 minutes. Serve with the rice.

Banana Chocolate Chip Muffins

2010-06-14T22:34:00.000-07:00

Banana Chocolate Chip Muffins

Makes about 18 muffins (Weight Watchers- 3 points per serving)
Prep Time: 10m

This is a recipe that I have modified from many different ones. The banana taste is not too strong, and there are just enough chocolate chips per muffin- feel free to add more if you like them more chocolaty. The original recipe also included half a cup of melted butter with the other wet ingredients, until I accidentally left it out one time and thought the muffins still turned out to be just as good (and healthier). Add it back in if you want a richer muffin. We go no-nuts here, but that's just because Jake wouldn't touch them if they contained nuts.

Ingredients:

2 bananas (well-ripened)
2 eggs
1 cup brown sugar (packed)
1 teaspoon vanilla
3/4 cup milk
1 1/2 cups flour
2 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup milk chocolate chips
1/4 cup walnuts, chopped (optional)

1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Place paper muffin cups in tin, or spray with non-stick cooking spray.
2. Mash bananas in a medium bowl using the back of a spoon. Add eggs, sugar, vanilla and milk, and mix on medium speed until well blended.

3. In a large bowl, combine flour, baking powder and salt. Stir in chocolate chips (and nuts if desired).
4. Make a well in the center of the dry ingredients. Pour in the banana mixture. Mix with a spoon until just blended.
5. Spoon the batter into muffin cups until they are about 3/4 full. Bake in 350 degree oven for 20 to 25 minutes (12-15 minutes for mini muffins). Remove from pan to cool on a wire rack.

Can a person live on just chicken fingers, mac 'n cheese and peanut butter sandwiches? Apparently.

2010-06-13T20:19:00.000-07:00

Jake: "Remember when we went to that festival the other day?"
Me: "Which festival? We go to a lot of festivals." [Kind of true.] "The Sanitation Department [i.e. garbage trucks]? The fire station?"
Jake: "No, not a festival, actually... you know, that place where we got all the beautiful food?"
Me: "You mean the Farmer's Market?"
Jake: "Yeah, the Farmer's Market."

I LOVE that Jake can appreciate the beauty in fresh fruits and vegetables. And we DID buy a lot of colorful, fragrant, beautiful food from the Playa Vista Farmer's Market on Saturday- nectarines, cherries, strawberries, swiss chard, red chard, bok choy, carrots, celery, basil, fresh-squeezed orange juice and sourdough bread. I really wish I had thought to take a picture, it was all so beautiful. (The picture above is from Playa Vista Farmers' Market's Facebook page). BUT... I know that even though Jake can appreciate the beauty of all of this healthy food, it will be a struggle to get him to even try a taste of most of it.

How did my kid become such a picky eater? I can honestly say that I don't really know. As a baby, Jake ate anything. Pureed baby foods were pretty much anything-goes. I never found time to make my own baby foods- I was working, and bringing him to work with me, so it was like I had two jobs simultaneously. By the time I got home, that last thing that I wanted to do was make baby food, so I just bought the organic premade stuff, figuring that was better. As he got a little older, he transitioned to non-baby foods okay, too. At least, I think he did. I can remember him eating bits and pieces of my food. But, that was also the time that I wasn't really cooking at home, so we were picking up food pretty much every night. And honestly, when I was eating a burger and fries, it wasn't exactly the kind of food that I wanted to feed to my baby (or toddler, as he got a little older). So, I guess that was the beginning of when I started making him his own meals.

I wanted his food to be healthy, but also convenient. I wasn't cooking at home, so I wasn't making time for frequent trips to the grocery store. If I bought fresh fruits or vegetables, I would need to go to the store fairly often in order to keep the house stocked. So, I started buying freeze dried fruits and veggies. Trader Joe's has some good options- strawberries, mangoes, bananas. [Jake never liked the chewy dried fruits, only the ones that are freeze dried and crunchy.] Oh, and Snapea Crisps. Costco carries Brothers-All-Natural, which makes great freeze dried apples and pears. Whole Foods carries a brand called Just Tomatoes, and Jake has always loved their freeze dried peas (also the bananas, strawberries and mangoes). And Sensible Foods makes a great freeze dried corn (which I buy through Amazon). Jake always loved the freeze dried stuff, and it never went bad, unlike fresh fruits and veggies, which he might eat one day and then refuse the next. It was just the easiest way to get him to eat healthy food.

Besides freeze dried foods, Jake will (now) consistently eat chicken nuggets, french fries (although we don't cook them at home), and pizza. Sometimes macaroni and cheese (if from a box), bean and cheese burritos, cheese quesadillas, or a peanut butter sandwich (but absolutely NO jelly). He'll sometimes eat fresh grapes, strawberries and apples. And he drinks most fruit smoothies or juices. Oh, and bread and crackers. And pretty much any kind of dessert. Did I miss anything? I don't think so.

So, now that I AM actually cooking at home, and relatively healthy foods, I'm not sure how to get Jake to eat what I cook. I know, I know, if I really want him to eat what I cook, them I won't give him another option. But have you seen my kid? He's super skinny already. I'm certain he would choose NOT to eat at all, rather than eating something that he doesn't like.

And also, I'm not sure how much Jake's dietary preferences might be related to actual food allergies. It took me a long time (like, until adulthood) to realize that I have oral allergy syndrome, which basically means that I am mildly allergic to many raw fruits, vegetables and nuts. I used to think that I just avoided foods because I didn't like them. But once I started trying to make myself eat a wider variety of foods, I realized that the reason I didn't like many of them was because they make my throat itch, my lips tingle, or my tongue swell. Mangoes, bananas and avocados are some of the worst for me, to the point that I have actually felt like my throat was swelling shut when I ate too much. But I also react to a lesser extent to raw cucumbers, tomatoes, citrus, berries, melons, almonds, cashews, celery, carrots, peppers, potatoes, pears, kiwi, nectarines and plums. I mean, that's practically everything, right? So, what are the odds that Jake's picky eating habits are also related to mild food allergies? Pretty good, I think. I'm not saying that it explains ALL of his pickiness, but I do think it's likely a confounding factor.

When Jake had his last birthday, we had a new rule, "Four year-olds try things." This worked for awhile, to get him to at least take a bite of the less-desirable foods. But we rarely get past that first bite, even now, 10 months later. Most of the time, he's already started shaking his head no and making a gross out face AS he's putting the food into his mouth. So, what now? In two more months, is it, "Five year-olds try at least five bites"? Or, "Five year-olds eat what their parents eat"? Because I have a feeling, if that's the case, then we'll all be eating chicken nuggets and fries.

The One with the Impending Frosting Disaster

2010-06-11T09:05:00.000-07:00

It's Food Waste Friday (see The Frugal Girl for what inspired me to show you pictures of this), which is something I've been keeping track of for the last couple of weeks. This is my third post of all the food that I am tossing for the week, in an effort to keep track and hold myself accountable for the food that I have wasted (while attempting to save money and do something better for the environment). I'm actually a little sad that I haven't made much improvement so far, but I'll keep trying.

The bean burrito and fries are Jake's meal from Paco's Tacos. As you probably know by now, Jake hates leftovers, but I saved them because I thought Brody would eventually eat the burrito, at least. But after a few attempts at reheating it for him, I realized perhaps my 15-month old is not such a fan of leftovers, either. The cauliflower and broccoli really should have gotten finished off, but they suddenly had black spots on them, so I wasn't risking it. And I seem to have burned out on salads because I couldn't force myself to finish off the big bag of spinach, even though it has been my favorite (actually, my real favorite is the ET TU Caesar Salad kit with red leaf lettuce, but that's not exactly healthy. Maybe I should try the light version). Oh, and that bag of peas. I hate peas; they're disgusting. Chris is not so fond of them, either. Jake will ONLY eat them if they're freeze dried. And Brody apparently only likes them if they're in processed baby food, and even then, not so much. I thought I could just keep presenting them and eventually they would get eaten. Instead, I mostly ended up with peas on the floor.

Now, before I end up with a ton of what was once-delicious Whipped Cream / Cream Cheese Frosting being thrown out next week, can someone please tell me, what do you do with leftover frosting? I made a really fantastic Chocolate Cake (not from a box) (thanks again, Frugal Girl), and it was the perfect icing. But now I have a ton left over. The only thing I can think of is to spread some on saltines for a sweet snack. Which sounds yummy, but slightly white-trashy (no offense to anyone who does this). And not exactly healthy or helpful when you're calorie-counting. Any ideas?

I haven't been too impressed with many of the Weight Watchers recipes I've found

2010-06-11T07:55:00.000-07:00

Weight Watchers online has a nice feature in that it includes a list of many recipes that are relatively healthy, and generally pretty easy to prepare. Often, the recipe is for something that is generally considered not-so-healthy (like cheeseburgers), but Weight Watchers provides ideas for making it better for you with different ingredients and smaller portions (like using ground turkey, and making smaller "sliders"). I've tried a few of the recipes that were not so yummy (how can a chicken with broccoli and garlic stir fry go wrong?), and I think way too many of them are focused on snacks and desserts to be useful to me (since I'd prefer to save my WW points for the actual meal). But I thought I'd post a few of the recipes that we have enjoyed.

TOMATO AND FETA FRITTATA
(POINTS® Value: 3)

Servings: 4 (1 wedge per serving)
Preparation Time: 8 min
Cooking Time: 12 min
Level of Difficulty: Easy

Terrific for breakfast, lunch or dinner. Serve with sliced tomatoes sprinkled with sea salt and fresh basil.

Ingredients

2 spray(s) cooking spray
1 small shallot(s), chopped
2 large egg(s)
4 large egg white(s)
1/4 tsp table salt, or to taste
1/4 tsp black pepper, or to taste
1 1/2 cup(s) grape tomatoes, cut in half if large
1/2 cup(s) crumbled feta cheese
2 Tbsp dried bread crumbs (Panko are light, coarse bread crumbs available in the Asian section of the supermarket, but other bread crumbs work, too.)
Fresh basil for garnish, if desired

Instructions

Preheat broiler.

Coat a large heavy-bottomed ovenproof skillet with cooking spray; set over medium heat. Add shallot to skillet; cook until tender, stirring occasionally, about 5 minutes.

In a medium bowl, beat together eggs, egg whites, salt and pepper; stir in tomatoes and shallot.

Coat bottom and sides of same skillet with cooking spray; set over medium heat. Pour egg mixture into skillet; cook until almost set, loosening edges of frittata occasionally, about 5 minutes. Sprinkle cheese over eggs; top with bread crumbs.

Place skillet under broiler, 4 inches from heat; broil until cooked through and panko browns, about 30 seconds to 1 minute (watch carefully to avoid burning). Remove from broiler immediately and let sit for 1 minute; cut into 4 wedges. Sprinkle with fresh basil if desired.

ITALIAN PASTA AND BEAN SOUP WITH SAUSAGE
(POINTS® Value: 4)

Servings: 9 (about 1 1/2 cups per serving)
Preparation Time: 12 min
Cooking Time: 15 min
Level of Difficulty: Easy

Packed with beans, sausage and spaghetti, this soup delivers a big hearty taste. Top with minced pickled peppers for extra flavor.

Ingredients

31 oz canned white beans, small variety, drained and rinsed
2 spray(s) cooking spray
1 tsp olive oil
1/8 oz fresh sage, about 3 to 4 medium leaves, finely chopped
2 medium garlic clove(s), minced
1/2 pound(s) cooked chicken sausage, Italian-style, cut into bite-size pieces
28 oz canned crushed tomatoes, with puree
1 Tbsp canned tomato paste, or to taste
2 1/2 cup(s) water
3 cup(s) canned chicken broth
1 tsp table salt, or to taste
1/4 tsp red pepper flakes, or to taste
3 oz uncooked whole-wheat spaghetti, broken into small pieces

Instructions

Puree half of beans in a blender; set aside.

Coat bottom of a large soup pot with cooking spray. Add oil; heat over medium heat. Add sage and garlic; cook, stirring constantly, until fragrant, about 1 minute. Add sausage; cook, stirring frequently, until sausage starts to brown, about 2 to 3 minutes.

Add pureed beans, whole beans, crushed tomatoes, tomato paste, water, broth, salt and pepper to pot. Bring soup to a boil; stir in spaghetti. Continue cooking soup according to time specified by pasta manufacturer.

Season to taste with salt and red pepper flakes.

EGG SALAD
(POINTS® Value: 3)

Servings: 4 (about 1/2 cup per serving)
Preparation Time: 10 min
Cooking Time: 10 min
Level of Difficulty: Easy

Forever a classic, our egg salad is light and delicious. Made with low-fat mayo, Dijon mustard and chives, it’s perfect as a sandwich filling or served over greens.

Ingredients

4 large egg(s)
2 large egg white(s), you’ll have to boil these as whole eggs and discard the yolks
2 Tbsp chives, fresh, chopped
2 Tbsp reduced-calorie mayonnaise
1/2 tsp Dijon mustard
1/4 tsp table salt
1/4 tsp black pepper, freshly ground
1/4 tsp ground paprika for added flavor and color, if desired

Instructions

Place eggs in a medium saucepan and pour in enough water to cover them; set pan over high heat and bring to a boil. Reduce heat to medium-low and simmer for about 10 minutes; drain and place eggs in an ice-water bath.

When eggs are cool enough to handle, remove shells. Discard yolks from two of the eggs. Chop remaining whole eggs and whites into bite-size pieces.

Transfer eggs to a medium bowl. Add chives, mayonnaise, mustard, salt and pepper; mix until blended.

Checking off my list

2010-06-11T07:33:00.000-07:00

In case you missed them from my previous post, here's the list I made last week of my 10 Personal Commandments:

Act how I want to feel
Accept others for who they are
Don't keep score
Say "thank you"
Practice active listening
Get outside everyday
Lighten up
Do it now
Get enough sleep
Choose happiness

I have been working on my daily checklist to see how well I am doing at following my own rules (yes, it's an actual checklist that I mark everyday; I need a way to hold myself accountable). When do I get credit for each one? Well, since the point is for me to actively think about making changes (and I realize that I am still learning and not perfect), I give myself a check if I find myself stopping to think and applying one of my resolutions at any point during the day. So, maybe I didn't say "thank you" at every opportunity during the day, but if I did specifically remember to do it at some point during the day, then I give myself credit.

So far, I'm averaging about 80% per day. Which isn't bad. But, considering my criteria of having to do each thing only once per day, I really feel like I should be able to achieve 100% more consistently.

I'm having a really hard time with "Get enough sleep"- I have done that less than half the time. Sometimes, it's a good excuse, like I was out on a date with my hubby, and then got up with the baby in the morning and let the hubby sleep in. But, most of the time, my excuse is something along the lines of we have to finish this marathon series finale of LOST because I can't wait one more day to find out how it ends! Luckily, we're hitting the end of television season and I don't have any new shows planned for watching during the summer season. Hopefully I can start to do a little better with getting to bed at a good time.

I'm also not doing as well as I expected with my resolve to "Get outside everyday". I don't know why this is so hard for me, except that there always seems to be something else that is more important, like running errands or cooking or cleaning. Maybe I need to set aside a certain time of each day to go for a walk? Or maybe I need to plan a weekly schedule at the beginning of each week, with new places to visit?

The ones that I have done well are "Act how I want to feel", "Practice active listening", and "Choose happiness". Three of the most important ones, so now I just need to work on doing them more consistently throughout the day.

Oh, and I found some help with my commandment to "Do it now". Once again, from Gretchen Rubin's Happiness Project: her One-Minute Rule. It's simple: if a task can be done in a minute or less, it must be done immediately. Coming in from the car: instead of throwing my jacket down next to my purse, hang it up immediately. Sort mail and discard junk mail as soon as it comes into the house. After finishing up a snack: put the bowl in the dishwasher. Checking email: if it'll take less than a minute, respond immediately. Make the bed in the morning. Put away my shoes. Wipe off the bathroom mirror. The idea is that all of these little tasks get taken care of right away, instead of building up until the whole mess seems unmanageable. And theoretically, this will leave extra time for some of those bigger tasks that there's never enough time for. Honestly, I'm not sure if it's working for me yet, but it's an interesting mindset. I think if I started with a clean house, this might work a little better, so I'll have to get back to you next week, once I've had the chance to get some cleaning done.

More Delicious (and Healthy) Recipes

2010-06-05T07:23:00.000-07:00

Since I included the delicious pasta salad recipe in my last post, I realized that I haven't yet shared a great SUPER EASY recipe from my friend Amy that we've been having at least a couple of times per month lately. French dip sandwiches with sweet potato fries- healthy, yummy and so quick to make- everything I look for in a weekday meal. And since I'm posting this, I also wanted to include Shana's recipe for crock pot pork chops and potatoes, and a yummy pasta version of shepherd's pie. If you guys have other recipes to share, send them this way!

Amy's French Dip Sandwiches
(makes 4 sandwiches, 6 WW points each)

1 package sliced roast beef
1 can low-sodium beef broth
Dried onion (optional)
Pepper, garlic, salt seasoning if desired (I just use Montreal Steak Seasoning)
4 sandwich rolls (whole wheat hot dog buns from Trader Joe's are perfect)
4 slices of cheese (optional, provolone or Swiss are great)

1. Toast rolls. (I throw them in the oven, and after they are toasted, I add the cheese so that it can melt.)

2. In a small saucepan, bring broth with dried onion and any other desired spices to a low boil. (I actually just do this in the microwave.)

3. Assemble sandwiches by dipping roast beef briefly into the broth (about 30 seconds) and stuffing into rolls.

4. Serve with broth on the side to dip (au jus).

Sweet potato fries make an easy, yummy side with this meal. The pre-cut sweet potatoes from Trader Joe's are perfect for this- just toss with a teaspoon of olive oil and any desired spices (again, I just use a little Montreal Steak Seasoning). Bake at 400 degrees for about 20 minutes (turn them halfway through). They turn out soft and nicely browned, but if you prefer crispy fries, I'm told that you just need to coat them with a little egg whites before baking (I haven't tried it myself).

Shana's Pork Chops a-la-crock pot

Thick sliced pork chops (number depends on size of crock pot)
1-2 packets of Lipton onion soup, dry mix
Worcestershire sauce (to taste- use liberally)
Water
Pepper
Garlic powder

Place pork chops, onion soup mix, Worcestershire sauce and enough water for gravy (pork chops should be immersed) in crock pot in the morning. Add enough pepper to create a lovely peppery layer at the top of concoction. Leave enough time to cook chops on high for 30 minutes before leaving. After 30-60 minutes, set crock pot on low setting and set timer for as many hours as you’ll be gone (preferably 6-10). Pork chops can be frozen if you plan on leaving them in for a long time, but thawed chops are usually more tender. Shana has also been known to throw in some red potatoes in for the last few hours. Enjoy!

Cheesy Italian Penne Shepherd’s Pie
(Serves 6, 8 Weight Watchers points per serving)

From Rachel Ray's website, modified slightly to have less fat- more time consuming than I prefer, but I can make it over the weekend and freeze it for an easy weekday meal. This Italian version of a Shepherd's Pie is so healthy and delish. It uses ground turkey instead of lamb, and has added zucchini and carrots for a veggie boost!

• 1/2 pound mini penne or any mini short-cut pasta
• Salt
• 1 tablespoon extra virgin olive oil
• 1 pound ground turkey
• 3 cloves garlic, finely chopped
• 1 medium onion, diced
• 3 medium carrots, diced
• 1 medium zucchini, diced
• 1 1/2 tablespoons tomato paste
• 1 cup chicken stock, divided
• 1 tablespoon poultry seasoning
• 1 tablespoon butter
• 3 tablespoons all-purpose flour
• 1 cup milk
• 1 cup shredded provolone

Preheat oven to 400°F.

Place a large pot filled with water over high heat and bring up to a boil to cook the pasta. Once boiling, add some salt and the pasta, and cook until al dente according to package directions. Heads up – reserve one cup of starchy water before draining the cooked pasta. Drain well and transfer pasta back to the cooking pot.

While the water is coming up to a boil for the pasta, place a large skillet over high heat with olive oil. Once the oil starts to ripple, add the ground turkey and break it up into small pieces as it cooks using the back of a wooden spoon or a potato masher. Cook until the turkey is nice and brown, about 8-10 minutes.

Add the veggies and cook until tender, about 5 minutes. Add the tomato paste, 1/2 cup chicken stock, half of the reserved starchy water, poultry seasoning, salt and pepper. Continue to cook for 10 more minutes, stirring every now and then.

While the veggies and turkey are cooking, place a medium-size sauce pot over medium heat with the butter. Once the butter melts, add the flour and cook 1 minute, whisking constantly so the flour doesn't burn. Whisk in the milk and the rest of the starchy pasta water and chicken stock, bring up to a simmer and cook until thickened. Once thick, turn off the heat, add the cheese to the pot and stir until completely melted. Season with salt and pepper to taste.

Cover the bottom of a large, oven-safe baking dish with the turkey and veggie mixture. Meanwhile, add the cheese sauce to the reserved pasta in the pasta pot. Stir to coat then transfer the cheesy pasta to the baking dish. Spread it out to cover the turkey mixture evenly. Place in the oven and bake until the top is golden brown, about 12-15 minutes.

Food Waste Friday and Updates

2010-06-04T12:57:00.000-07:00

Here's my food waste from this week. Actually, I don't think it's quite as bad as it looks. About a quarter of container of raspberries- it makes me a little sad that we couldn't get to all of them before they got really mushy and then moldy. I learned that I should not buy fresh fruit right before the weekend (at least nothing that will spoil quickly), because we don't eat enough snacks and meals at home to use it up before it goes bad (seriously, they were gross by Monday). A small scoop of mashed potatoes- I meant to feed those to Brody since I thought he would like them, but apparently forgot about them in the back of the fridge. A slice of pizza- I blame Jake for that since it was his pizza, and he refuses to eat leftovers. He says, "Leftovers make my head hurt."

All of the other little containers were ones that I just recently pulled out of the freezer. As I was packing lunches for Jake and Chris this week, I started to wonder what had happened to all of our little plastic bowls. Then I remembered that a few months ago, I decided to make homemade baby food for Brody. Which he refused to eat. I tried feeding them to him again this week, and when he refused, I tried to get our friend Delaney (who's 17-months old) to eat them. No luck there, either. I guess I am just not a good baby food maker. So, those are the containers of pureed carrots, sweet potatoes, peas, white beans and bananas which the babies would not eat.

We did manage to eat up a lot of other leftovers, though, so I am happy for that. Well, mostly happy- there were a couple more things that maybe should have made it into the food waste picture. Trying out a new recipe, I cooked way too much pasta salad with chicken and veggies at the beginning of last week, right before Chris went to Canada for a few days. (I swear it was really yummy, though- check out the recipe at the end of this post). I just couldn't eat that all myself and grew tired of pasta salad everyday. When Chris returned, I sent the rest of it to work with him in a to-go container, with instructions to find a homeless person to donate it to (he works on Hollywood Boulevard, I'm pretty sure that would be an easy task). I haven't asked him about it yet, but I really doubt he did it. My guess is that it's currently going bad in the refrigerator at his work. (Edit: Chris read this post and was offended. Although I meant to imply that I probably did a poor job by making too much food, and likely wasted more food than I was accounting for, he took it to mean that I thought he did a poor job and wasted the food by not giving it away. Actually, he gave the pasta salad to the janitor (custodian? does that sound better?) at work.)

And then there were some chicken wings from Fresh Brothers, which Chris ate even though they were more than a week old, and had sat out on his desk at work when he didn't eat the lunch that I packed for him one day. That night, he was vomiting and didn't make it to work the next day. I still don't think it was food poisoning since Jake had the same issue a few days before (and threw up on Chris in the middle of the night), and I just had the same problem a few days later. But still, it's making me a little wary of leftovers past their prime.

Along with clearing out leftovers, I've also been cleaning out other clutter lately, namely in my email inbox. I get a ridiculous amount of email each day, and a lot of it is just junk. Which I can quickly delete, but it still takes up time, especially since I compulsively check my email just about every time my phone notifies me of a new message. So, it's been taking far more time than just deleting it, but I've been unsubscribing from all of the lists that I should never have gotten on in the first place. Even the ones that go directly to my "spam" folder, since I also spend time checking that, just to make sure that an important email didn't accidentally get directed there. Hopefully, this will eventually save me time in the long run. But, I'm even more proud of the fact that I have cleaned out the non-junk from my inbox, too! I try to respond to emails pretty quickly, but I have a habit of saving tons of emails- things I want to remember to check into, things that I have found interesting, things that I think I may need to refer back to. And then they just sit there in my inbox forever, and I have to scan through them each time to figure out which ones are ones that I still need to respond to. So, instead I created a few sub folders for emails that I really do need to save, and deleted the rest. Now, I have only three emails in my inbox- two which are work-related things that I need to take care of, and one about plans for this weekend. And I can just open my email and see in a glance what's new and what I need to complete.

Also, an update about my attempt to stop checking email in the car- I have finally made some progress there. I have made it a habit to check my email right before I leave the house, so that I won't be as tempted to do so in the car. And then, if I find myself still tempted, I borrowed a Learn Spanish CD from the library, so I just turn that on to distract me. Honestly, I don't think I'm learning much, but it's keeping me safer. :)

As for my 10 Personal Commandments, my anal-retentive self decided that I needed more of a reminder, and a way to hold myself accountable for actually following them. So I made a checklist with all 10 of them in columns across the top of the page, and then a row for each day of the month. I checked off 70% of them yesterday. I hope to do better today.

In case you're interested, here's that pasta salad recipe from my friend Debi, with a couple of little things that I altered. I wish I had taken a picture to share with you- it's quite colorful and pretty. It makes A LOT, so feel free to cut the recipe in half to avoid food waste. ;)

Pasta Salad with Chicken and Veggies
(8 servings, 6 WW points each)

1 ½ cups broccoli, florets, steamed
1 ½ cups cauliflower florets, steamed
1 cup asparagus, steamed
1 package (12 oz) vegetable radiatore (spiral) pasta from Trader Joe's, cooked per package instructions (or any other spiral pasta will do, but this three-color one is fun!)
1 cup shredded carrots
½ cup sweet red pepper (if desired, I may leave this out next time)
½ cup grated Parmesan cheese
2 cloves garlic
½ tsp black pepper, or to taste
2 cups cooked boneless, skinless chicken breast, chopped
½ cup Newman’s Own Salad Dressing, Balsamic Vinaigrette

Steam cauliflower, broccoli, and asparagus. Cook pasta per package instructions. Toss all ingredients together and refrigerate. Makes about 8 servings (1 ½ cups each).

Choosing Happiness, My 10 Personal Commandments

2010-06-02T23:51:00.000-07:00

I'm tired of fighting, nagging and feeling exasperated at home, mostly with my kids, but also sometimes with my husband. No, it's not all the time, but it feels like it's far more often than it should be. Inspired by The Happiness Project, I've been working on a list of personal commandments to help with this. These are different, and far more general than my original list of things that I wanted to change over this year (my "original" resolutions from the first blog posting, like losing weight, eating healthier and getting more exercise). These new commandments are more like inspirations for ways to live. For now, here's my list (BTW, I hope I am not just blatantly stealing too much from Gretchen Rubin, but I have found her approach quite inspiring lately):

1. Act how I want to feel-
“Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile, but sometimes your smile can be the source of your joy.”
-Buddhist Monk Thich Nhat Hanh

In my mind, "Act how I want to feel" has two meanings; the first connotation being that I can empower myself to act happy, which will in turn help me to actually be happier, and the second being that I should treat others how I want to be treated myself.

Let me clarify- I don't think that unhappiness has no purpose, and that you should repress your true emotions in order to "make" yourself act happy. I think if you're feeling unhappy about something, it's worth examining those feelings in order to determine what changes can be made. I mean, that's what prompted me to start blogging in the first place, and to resolve to make changes in my life. But sometimes, you really can just "choose happiness." It's been shown that simply smiling has actual health benefits, such as boosting the immune system, lowering blood pressure, releasing endorphins and reducing stress, not to mention helping to improve your mood and being contagious to those around you. So, why not practice smiling, if it's good for me and can actually make me happier?

The second meaning of "Act how I want to feel" is little more than The Golden Rule of "Do unto others as you would have others do unto you." I'm not talking about this in the sense of being a good Samaritan, but more in terms of my own everyday relationships. If I want my marriage to be sweet and romantic, then I must make an effort to do the little things that make it so. This doesn't come naturally to me, but I'm trying to be more thoughtful and anticipate needs. When Chris took the red eye to Canada, I surprised him with a travel pillow, wrapped up and put in his backpack with a little note. Yesterday, he was home sick from work, and I downloaded the new Jack Johnson album to add to his iPhone play list. (Okay, that one's also for my benefit, but still, Jack always makes me feel better.) This morning, it was apple pancakes for breakfast. These little things are important, maybe more important than the "big" events like birthdays- people enjoy unexpected treats more than expected ones. But I find it harder to do the little things on a daily basis. I mean, I feel like I do a ton of things for our entire family- cooking and cleaning and laundry and taking care of the kids. All day, every day. But those are definitely not the things that romance is made of. Sometimes it's hard to find the energy for anything more, but I think it's important to try. Hopefully being more thoughtful on my part will inspire others to reciprocate, but I must try to do it without keeping score (see Commandment 3).

2. Accept others for who they are-
"We all should know that diversity makes for a rich tapestry, and we must understand that all the threads of the tapestry are equal in value no matter what their color."
-Author Maya Angelou

In theory, I am all for celebrating diversity, and valuing the uniqueness of each individual. So, why then does it drive me crazy when people don't act the way that I think they should? I get frustrated, or even angry when people (like my husband and children) don’t do what I want them to do, when I want them to do it, and how I want them to do it. It drives me crazy that Chris does everything so slowly, and not how I would do it! He's always late for everything, and can't estimate how long anything is going to take him. He doesn't make decisions quickly, when I want an answer immediately. Even stupid little things like not being efficient in how he gets ready in the morning, or not changing lanes when he's driving. Or the worst, when we're playing back a TV show on the dvr and he doesn't get the commercial skip just right. ;) Why do these things drive me crazy, and why to I still try to change these things about him, even after almost 11 years of marriage?

I have a couple of theories about why these things irritate me. One, I can be a bit of a perfectionist. I would rather do everything myself than have it done not up to my standards (and my highest standard always seems to be efficiency- if something is done well, but slowly, it still drives me crazy). But I also get frustrated about "having to do everything myself," even though I know that it's my own fault. I think it really boils down to a need/desire for control.

The second theory is that the things which we don't like in others are often a reflection of what we don't like about ourselves. I'm not sure if this fits very well in my description about what drives me nuts about Chris, except that I am holding him to the high standard of efficiency to which I hold myself. Let me give you another example with Jake. He's bossy. When he wants to do something at preschool lately, he doesn't ask the teachers (and give them the opportunity to say, "no" or "not right now"), but instead tells the other kids that it's time to do it, like turning on the hose and starting water play. Yes, I can frame this in terms of the positive, and be grateful for his leadership qualities and his great ideas. And I am really proud of him. But, I also get frustrated when he thinks that he gets to make all of the rules and decisions, and doesn't automatically listen to the adult who is in charge. Am I really concerned about Jake, or am I more concerned that his bossiness is a reflection of my own?

Either way, accepting others for who they are is a really difficult thing for me. And that difficulty definitely leads to some of the nagging in our house. I know that I cannot change Chris to do things more efficiently and to be on time, as people can only change themselves. I can continue to feel exasperated, or I can laugh and say, "That's who he is." And more importantly, I shouldn't want him to change, as I should be able to accept my husband and kids for who they are, and and love them unconditionally. In the end, I can only change myself (and the way I let it affect me).

3. Don't keep score-
"When one loves, one does not calculate.”
-Saint Therese of Lisieux

In my head, I am always thinking things like, "I cooked dinner and did the dishes, the least Chris could do is take out the trash without me needing to ask." Or, "I took care of these kids all day long, HE really should be able to put them down to bed without my help." But do I ask him to help with something specific? No, I just get mad when he doesn't automatically do it, or resent him for not doing it as well (or quickly) as I would have.

On her Happiness Project blog, Gretchen writes about "unconscious overclaiming". Here's how it's explained: "It turns out that we unconsciously overestimate our contributions relative to other people's. Because we know and value our own contributions, we exaggerate how much we've contributed and undervalue what other people do. In one study, when business-school students in a work group estimated their individual contributions to the team effort, the total was 139%." I'm trying to use this info to remember that I probably do a lot of unconscious overclaiming, or maybe don't even notice the things that Chris contributes (as I'm sure he doesn't always notice all that I do). I will try not to "keep score," and to remember that we each contribute in different ways. And if I feel like I need help, ask nicely.

4. Say thank you-
"I would maintain that thanks are the highest form of thought, and that gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder."
-Writer Gilbert Keith Chesterton

I'm trying to remember to say "thank you" for the little things, and to remember to actually BE thankful (mentally). Doesn't it feel good when someone notices something that you've done and said thanks? It's also something that I've learned in parenting, that if you want to reinforce a certain behavior, it helps to give very specific praise. So, instead of saying, "Good job" when Jake cleans up his toys, I can say, "Thank you for picking up your toys. The house looks much cleaner, and now I'm not stepping on toys when I walk through the living room." Or telling Chris, "I really appreciate that you took out the trash tonight. It was starting to bug me that it was overflowing, and you allowed me extra time to answer emails. Now I'm ready for us to spend time together."

Remembering to say thank you also reminds me of how much I have to be thankful for. I've recently started a Gratitude Journal- writing down the little things that I appreciate each day. You know, freshly baked chocolate chip cookies, something funny that Jake said, an old favorite song that randomly came up on shuffle. Just thinking about those things makes me feel a little happier, and writing them down gives me something to reflect back on later as a reminder. It's also a reminder that life is not about being efficient, multi-tasking, and checking things off my to-do list. I need to slow down, look around, appreciate beauty and live in the moment.

5. Practice active listening-
“The first duty of love is to listen.”
-Philosopher Paul Tillich

It's easy to only half listen, especially to my children. I can be so busy trying to do everything at once- cooking dinner while cleaning up the kitchen as I go, or checking my email while letting the kids play in the bathtub- that I don't take the time to really listen to them, while Brody's telling me that he's hungry or Jake's telling me about his day at preschool. And then what happens? That's when they start splashing in the bathtub to get my attention, or arguing over having to share toys. Or Brody starts pulling all of the dirty dishes out of the dishwasher and throwing them on the floor. It's a reminder for me to stop what I am doing, and come down to their level. To listen to their words and observe their body language. To "listen" for feelings and reflect them back ("Wow, it sounds like you were feeling really frustrated about that."). To ask for clarification, and show empathy. And to figure out what it is that they are really trying to express- whether it's a need for connection (my attention), independence (he wanted to be able to do that himself), or choice (he wanted to eat something else for dinner). Sometimes, especially when my kids are having conflicts with one another, it's easy to quickly skip to trying to "solve" their problems, when sometimes all they really need is for me to listen while they express emotions. Instead, I should be trying to do a better job of asking questions and encouraging them to talk. It's amazing how competent they can already be in solving their own problems.

Active listening is something that I need to do better in my marriage as well. Chris doesn't often talk about how he's feeling or what's going on at work. Usually, he says that he has too much stress at work and he just wants to forget about it by the time he gets home. But, there are times when he's grumpy and I know that he's thinking about work. And I've also noticed that I go into "problem solving mode" the infrequent times that he does talk to me about work. I really just mean to be helpful, but it's quite presumptuous of me to imply that I could solve his work problems. And I think what he really needs is just to be heard, to "get it off his chest." I need to remember that active listening is not about solving problems for someone else, but just about hearing the other person and reflecting back their feelings.

6. Get outside everyday-
"Today I have grown taller from walking with the trees."
-Poet Karle Wilson Baker

Maybe some people are happy to stay home all day in their pajamas, but I have come to realize that I am not one of those people. Since I am not working much, it would be quite possible for me to stay at home almost the entire day (until picking Jake up from preschool). But it doesn't put me in a very good mood, and I find myself running errands just to get out of the house some days. What I've recently realized though, is that it can really improve my outlook to get outside and spend a little time in nature. Walking. Getting some exercise. We live in such a beautiful part of the world, where I can visit the beach, pier, boardwalk, mountains, parks, all within just a short drive. I need to remember to take advantage of the perfect-almost-everyday weather of Los Angeles, and head outdoors.

7. Lighten up-
"Dance like nobody's watching; love like you've never been hurt. Sing like nobody's listening; live like it's heaven on earth."
-Writer Mark Twain

A good way to have more fun is to act more fun. It definitely works with my kids. If I'm laughing, they're laughing- whether we're wrestling and tickling, blowing raspberries, or making funny faces and sounds. Sometimes it's hard to remember to play everyday. Act silly. Play music (loudly) and sing along. Dance. I want to be the mom that plays in the sand, jumps in the puddles, and does cartwheels in the grass. Much has been written about the importance of play in child development, but I think it's just as important in parent development.

8. Do it now-
"One of these days is just a day of the weak."
-Motivational Speaker Greg Hickman

I don't consider myself a big procrastinator. Not that I don't ever put things off until tomorrow, but I do prefer to tackle things on my to-do list sooner rather than later. But there are some things that I just ignore, somehow thinking that they will fix themselves. Like sleep training the baby. He's sleeping better through the night (most nights), but it's still so difficult to get him down to sleep in the first place. And I've been saying forever that it's time to do something about it. But there's always an excuse- he's sick (or seems like he's coming down with something), we have people visiting, or we're about to go out of town. But the reality is, I'm afraid that if we change anything, it will actually get worse for awhile, and I just don't want to deal with losing more sleep (even if it's only temporary). He's now 15 months old, and if we had started sleep training months ago, this would be a non-issue, and we would have saved so many more hours of sleep for him and ourselves in the long run.

Another example: the curtain rod. The walls of our house are made out of plaster. Which, it turns out, is very crumbly. When we screw something into the wall, we have to use anchors to make it actually stay, and even that doesn't always work well. We have a curtain rod in our extra room that is starting to sag. It's just not well anchored into the wall. To the extent that, if one of the kids yanked on the curtain, the whole rod would probably fall down on his head. And almost everyday, I see this and it annoys me. But it's been weeks, and still I have not gotten around to fixing it. The problem is that I'm not entirely sure how I'll fix it, without removing the whole thing and drilling new holes in different places. If I had just taken care of it weeks ago, it would no longer be an issue, but instead, it's something that bugs me almost every day.

One website that I have found very helpful is FlyLady.net, a site that offers support and advice for decluttering, establishing better habits and routines, and maintaining a tidier home, especially for people living in "CHAOS" (can't have anyone over syndrome). Sometimes, the task seems too overwhelming, and those of us that are perfectionists don't ever both to start since we know we won't have the time to do the task to our standards. FlyLady encourages "babysteps" to start slowly and establish new routines. She also maintains that you can do anything for 15 minutes, so set a timer to get started, and when the timer goes off you stop, even if you didn't finish the task. In all likelihood, you'll realize that there's a lot that you can accomplish in a short amount of time, and even if it's not perfect, at least there is progress. Perfectionism leads to procrastination, and there's no time like the present to get started.

9. Get enough sleep-
"Sometimes the most productive thing one can do is to sleep.”
-Anonymous

Most adults don't get as much sleep as they need on a daily basis, and numerous studies have highlighted the health problems associated with a lack of sleep. (See a recent post from my friend Vince which discusses the importance of sleep.) A study from the University of Michigan found that getting more sleep can also improve your happiness. “Making $60,000 more in annual income has less of an effect on your daily happiness than getting one extra hour of sleep a night,” according to study author Norbert Schwarz, PhD. Almost anything is easier when you've gotten enough sleep- including practicing active listening, being playful, or tackling an unpleasant project. My difficulty is in getting myself to go to bed at a decent time. I can be yawning and ready for sleep at 7:00, while I'm getting the kids ready for bed. But later, my second wind comes, and I don't want to go to bed. It's hard to give up that time of night when the kids are asleep, and I can choose for myself anything that I want to do, uninterrupted. But I definitely pay for it the next day.

10. Choose happiness-
“What a wonderful life I’ve had! I only wish I’d realized it sooner.”
-Novelist Sidonie Gabrielle Colette

Yes, I realize that I kind of already covered this in my first commandment, "Act how I want to feel." But I think it's the most important one, so it's worth putting it out there again. And, I like that it rounds out the list for a nice, even 10 Personal Commandments. Even if I forget all the others, I just need to remember to "Choose Happiness."

Flat Cookies and Food Waste. Yum?

2010-05-29T21:12:00.000-07:00

Jake decided that he wanted to bake something this afternoon. (Yes, I realize that the above picture is not the most appetizing if we're talking about baking, but bear with me, I'll eventually get to the explanation.) If you know me, you know that I don't often bake. Not until the end of the year, that is, because the holidays are baking time, in my mind at least. It's not that I don't like to do it year-round. It's just that I don't want to eat too much of a not-so-healthy food (and that's the only stuff worth baking), and then we don't often finish off whatever it is before it's gone bad/stale, and then I feel bad about eventually throwing it out. So, I feel guilty if I do eat it, and I feel guilty if I don't. But Jake is really into baking (I think at least partially because they do it so often at preschool), so we pulled out a cookbook this afternoon and sat down to decide what we should make together. After a little deliberation, we settled on chocolate chip cookies. I didn't actually go with the recipe in Jake's Betty Crocker Kid's Cook!, but instead went with my all-time favorite cookies, Martha Stewart's recipe for Soft and Chewy Chocolate Chip Cookies (2 Weight Watchers points per cookie).

Now, since I don't often bake, I needed to check the list of ingredients to figure out what we had on hand, and what I needed to pick up from the store. I picked up the flour container, and it felt heavy enough that I knew we had plenty for cookies. But on a whim, I decided to actually open it up and check on the flour inside (since last time I baked anything was probably before Christmas). Sure enough, I opened up the bag to see hundreds of tiny black dots moving around. Apparently, these little bugs are known as flour weevils and are usually present as larvae inside the bag of flour even before you get it home, so that's how they manage to grow and multiply inside a sealed container. Gross. A trip to the grocery store was a definite necessity before the baking would commence.

Anyhow, this discovery reminded me of one of my new favorite blogs, The Frugal Girl. Every Friday, she posts her Food Waste Friday blog, which includes a picture of the food that she throws out each week, in an effort to hold herself accountable for reducing the amount of waste. If you look back at the earlier blogs, you can see that she was wasting what was probably less than the average household, but still a lot compared to what gets wasted now (she often has weeks with no waste at all).

Okay, so you guessed it. The picture at the top is my own Food Waste Friday, er, make that Saturday.

-About a quarter of the bag of flour.

-A relatively small amount of salt. I know, you're probably wondering how salt goes bad. Well, when you've had it so long that it clumps up, and even when you beat the container against the counter, you can't seem to break it down enough to get the salt to pour out the top, then it's gone bad. That's my definition, at least. The only way that I could have gotten the last big chunk out would have been to somehow tear the top off of the container to access it, and that just seemed like way too much work, especially considering that I already had another unopened container in the pantry. (It's actually a small cabinet where we keep the food, but I like to think of it as a pantry. It feels fancier. But, I digress.)

-Most of a very small can of tomato paste. (What do you do with the rest of it when the recipe only calls for a tablespoon or two? No, those aren't marshmallows in there, it's mold. Yes, that one had been in the fridge for awhile.)

-Half of a container of grape tomatoes (I'm not a big tomato fan, so I find it hard to finish those off before they become wrinkly and gross).

-The rest of a can of enchilada sauce.

-About a dozen pepperoni.

-Most of a jar of pizza sauce. I guess I should freeze the tomato-based products in smaller, usable quantities after I open them, huh?

Anyhow, I don't even think this was that bad of a week for me, but I am wondering if I already threw out other stuff earlier in the week that I didn't document. Hmm, I think I should try to do this regularly and see what comes of this little experiment.

But maybe I need to take a step back for a minute to tell you why I even care. Recent studies have shown that the average U.S. household wastes approximately 14% of their food purchases, or that a family of four throws out $590 per year in just meats, fruits, vegetables and grain products. This is a waste of the water, energy and oil that went into producing, packaging, transporting and selling the food, even if it does get composted. If not, it goes into the landfill, where yes, it decomposes, but that's part of the problem because it causes a release of methane, which is about 23 times more damaging than carbon dioxide in trapping heat in our atmosphere. Every bit of food wasted contributes significantly to increasing our overall carbon footprint.

So, I may not be saving the world by taking a picture of our household's food waste from this week, but at least I'm trying to hold myself accountable. I could do a better job of planning meals around foods that we already have in the pantry or fridge, and at least cleaning out my fridge weekly will help me to see what's lurking in there that should be used up soon before it goes bad. Now, I really should check the freezer...

But again, I digress, because I started out this post talking about cookies.

So, Jake and I spent the afternoon baking chocolate chip cookies, and we had fun doing it. But, every time I have baked cookies in the last six months (which is probably a grand total of four times), they have turned out totally flat. And this time was no exception. Here, see for yourself:

I really don't understand what the problem is that causes my cookies to go flat. They seem fine until the start to bake, and then they just spread. And these last four batches of cookies were made by me in three different kitchens (in three different states, for that matter), with different recipes, different ingredients, different tools and different baking sheets. The only thing they had in common was me. Apparently, I bake flat cookies. But this didn't used to be a problem, so what about me, or my technique, has changed? I honestly don't know. I don’t let the butter melt; in fact I usually have a hard time waiting until it’s room temperature, so if anything, it’s over-chilled. I put the dough in the fridge in between batches, so that it stays chilled. I let the cookie sheet cool completely between batches. The only thing that I can think of is that maybe I over mix the dough? Because the butter is too cold, I have to work harder to mix it with the sugar, which adds more air into the dough, which causes it to spread more and flatten in the oven? I don’t know, but it’s the only theory that I could come up with. I may have to make another batch just to test my theory.

But, I should say, I think I might actually like the flat cookies even better- chewy in the middle and a little crispy around the edges. YUM!

How Did I Leave Project 50/50 Off My List??!

2010-05-24T09:52:00.000-07:00

I don't know why I didn't include this one in my last post, except that it's not a regular blog that I follow, but rather I get my updates via Facebook. My friend Vince Yanez (who gives tons of his own updates of sorts via Facebook) introduced me to Project 50/50, and if you're looking for something inspirational, check it out. Shay Kelley began a journey in January of this year in her blue Ford pickup, with a goal of traveling to all 50 states in 50 weeks, going door to door to collect at least 200 cans of food to donate each week, and along the way, interviewing people and taking pictures to tell their stories. Her own story? She lost her job in marketing and had her car stolen in the same week, found herself homeless, thought her life needed direction and purpose, and set off to help other homeless people across the country. No, I'm not ready to devote an entire year to that kind of volunteerism, but it does remind me that every person makes a difference. Pretty cool, huh?

By the way, this hobby search of mine, I think it's really because I'm not working right now, and so it seems like a good time to start something new. Yes, blogging could certainly count as a hobby, and especially with the amount of time that I've spent on it this week. But I can't blog about nothing, and the thing I like about all the other blogs on my list is that they were formed around one central (bigger) purpose. What can I say, I like to be inspired.

But really, since this was about changing the things that I didn't like about myself, the hobby part of it boils down to this: I want to be an artist. I want to be able to create beauty and share it with others. I wish I had the kind of talent and creativity that I see in my friends. I want to be able to draw, paint, sculpt, write, photograph, tell stories and make music. I want to do all of those things, and yet I want to devote my time to none of those things. I'm not sure what I'm looking for, but I know that I'm still looking.

Photography, Sex, Food? Those Sound Like Great Hobbies!

2010-05-23T22:29:00.000-07:00

In thinking about a "hobby" to help me with the list of things that I wanted to change over this year, I started reflecting on some really cool things that I have recently discovered online. I'll try not go into detail about ones that you probably already know about, like The Julie/Julia Project, or hobbies that definitely don't interest me, like 365 Days of Trash or The Year of Living Biblically, or ones that just aren't appropriate for me like The Year of Yes. But here's a list of other inspiring people who found a hobby and started a yearly (or longer) project:

Jonathan Wilson of jawsnap photography is the husband of one of my co-workers. He started his One/Day Project with the goal of taking one unique photo every day for a year and uploading it to his website. He's now in Year 3 of the Project, and takes some of the most amazing photos. I mean, who else do you know that can make pesto look sexy? Jonathan is also the photographer who took these amazing photos (and many, many more) at Brody's first birthday party.

Cathleen Cherry is one of Chris's college friends, and I am very happy to now claim her as one of my own. Cathleen says Jonathan's One/Day Project was one of her inspirations for her weekly blog Chez Cerise, which was one of my inspirations for starting my own blog. Since I introduced her to Jonathan's work, I like to think it comes around full circle. But unlike my little blog, Cathleen is like a real writer. She's smart, funny, passionate, and inspiring, and she tells a great story. Really, check out Easter Sunrise, Sonoita circa 1977. Or Carnitas Kid. Or her impassioned plea, How to Make a Civilization Flourish.

1000 Awesome Things is a blog by a guy named Neil Pasricha, and is all about finding joy in the little things in life, like #995 Finding money you didn't even know you lost, or #585 Figuring out the plot twist just before they reveal it. He posts a new AWESOME thing every weekday. Most inspiring? He started this after his best friend committed suicide, and when he and his wife started going their separate ways. It was his attempt to "get things back on track by talking about one simple, universal little joy every single day — like snow days, bakery air, or popping bubble wrap."

The Happiness Project is also awesome because it's kind of EXACTLY what I am doing with this blog, Time for a Change. Okay, not quite exactly, since Gretchen Rubin had a far more organized approach, as she spent a year "test-driving the wisdom of the ages, the current scientific studies, and the lessons from popular culture about how to be happy." But it started with identifying what made her happy and what didn't, and taking small, concrete steps in her daily life to change. Seriously, watch this video: The days are long, but the years are short. The blog includes tips, quotes, interviews and helpful advice like act the way you want to feel. Another one of my favorites is her description of a fight with her husband, and how the Happiness Project didn't prevent her outburst of anger, but it did help her to overcome it more quickly. A lot of good, useful info packed into that one post.

And then there's a different kind of happiness project, 365 Nights: A Memoir of Intimacy. Have you heard of this one? Charla Muller decided to give her husband Brad an unusual gift for his 40th birthday: a promise to have sex with him every day for a year. Actually, don't bother to check out the blog, it's really little more than an uninteresting description of her current speaking engagements. Because there are audiences everywhere that want to ask, "Really? Everyday? No, really, every day???" And I can't claim to have actually read the book, but seriously, it's an interesting, umm, hobby to consider.

And just to round out my list with a "green" blog, I recently came across one that I enjoy. At the beginning of 2009, Angela Barton pledged to join The Compact (a group based in San Fransisco that makes an effort to counteract US consumer culture by going beyond recycling and buying nothing new). This meant borrowing or buying used only, with a few exceptions like food, medicine, personal care items, socks and underwear. She has been documenting her story on My year without spending, and includes pictures and stories from other people that have inspired her, like The Frugal Girl's Food Waste Fridays (pictures documenting any food wasted that week), the Meatless Monday initiative, or the girl who made her prom dress out of Starburst wrappers. Seriously. (And by the way, The Frugal Girl is in itself a very interesting blog, including, among other things, her weekly grocery/meal plans, and some great looking recipes I plan to try out.

Just slightly off topic, I feel like I would be a little remiss if I didn't include a wonderful book on this list, Barbara Kingsolver's Animal Vegetable Miracle: A Year of Food Life, which documents her family's attempt to eat only home-grown, or when unavailable, locally grown food for a year. If you've never read Kingsolver, you should, and I found the book very informative and inspiring, even if I still haven't started my own home garden. Maybe one day.

I don't know if any of this has brought me closer to finding my own hobby just yet. Unless surfing the Internet counts, of course. I may just have to give up that "Spend less time on the computer" goal.

*******************************
All right, anyone getting tired of all my links lately? Can you tell I'm having a lot of fun with them? (If you don't know what I'm talking about, click on any of the words that are printed in bold green and it'll take you to the related website. See? Fun!)

Please Excuse My Soapbox, I Really Just Meant to Give You an Update

2010-05-21T15:11:00.000-07:00

It's been 11 weeks and 3 days since I first started this blog. Why am I counting? Well, I wasn't, but then I thought it would be nice to look back and see what kind of changes have happened since I started. It would be nice if it had been a real milestone, like the 3-month mark, or even 12 weeks maybe. I could hold off to post this next Tuesday, but do I really need to wait just because it appeals to my sense of order and perfectionism?

Here's my original list of what I wanted to change, or actually a slightly condensed/edited version:
-Lose weight
-Have a more active lifestyle
-Cook food at home
-Eat healthier food (less fast food)
-Find a hobby
-Spend less money at Target
-Improve the world (volunteer)
-Drink less soda
-Use reusable bags
-Spend less time on the computer
-Stop reading emails, etc. while driving
-Let Chris know that I appreciate him
-Keep my car clean

Well, I've made some improvement in about 85% of those goals, and I would say significant improvement in several of them. But it needs more work. How 'bout a quick assessment? (Okay, okay, I know I'm really unlikely to do it quickly, but here it goes anyhow.)

Lose weight: I think this counts as my biggest success so far. I have lost 21 pounds, and I feel much, much better about how I look. I haven't put on a swimsuit lately, but I can tell you that I could use some new (smaller sized) pants. My goal is still to lose another four pounds, and I'll do it, although it feels like slow going here at the end. But I'm really concerned about whether or not I'll be able to keep it off long term. I've never dieted before in my life, and Weight Watchers tells me that I should think of this as more of a lifestyle change than a diet. But honestly, I don't want to change my life to have to always be thinking about what I ate last and what I can "afford" to eat next without gaining weight. Will I ever be able to stop counting points? I hope so, but I think I've got a long way to go in the "maintenance phase" before I get there.

Active lifestyle: I don't count this one as nearly as much of a success. Yes, I am walking FAR more frequently. I try to take a walk with Brody in the stroller almost every day. But it's usually a short walk, like to the grocery store or Trader Joe's, and it's definitely not a "power walk". I've also been doing about 15 minutes of strengthening exercises at home about four times a week (sit-ups, leg lifts, push-ups, etc.). But I still haven't made it to the gym. Yes, we pay for a gym membership that doesn't really get used. And yes, they have childcare, so it shouldn't be that hard for me to plan time to go during the week. But since the last few times Brody went to the childcare, he cried so much that they had to come get me, I haven't been excited about the idea of bringing him back. I just need to do it, but there's always an excuse, like he has a cold or he's grumpy because it's too close to naptime. I realize it's time to move past the excuses and just give it a try because I'd really like to start going to at least one of the weekly exercise classes that they offer (yoga and kickboxing have been quite fun in the past). I put the classes that sounded good on my calendar, so at least I'll have a reminder that I'm not doing it.

Cook at home AND Eat healthier (less fast food) AND Drink less soda: I think I can safely put these in one category, since they've all been about equally successful. I've been making meals at home usually every weekday, and we go out, or pick up food to bring home only on the weekends. I try to limit eating out on the weekends to no more than one meal per day, but that can be difficult depending on what we have planned for the day. We probably end up having "fast food" close to once a week, and I'm drinking about one to two sodas per week, which is far less than previously. Yes, it's healthier and I'm sure we're saving money. But that doesn't mean that I don't think about eating out every single day. I would gladly have El Pollo Loco for lunch everyday, or have Chris stop to pick up Panda Express on his way home. But the reality is that there is no way that we could do that AND still stay within my allotted 19 points per day. (Yeah, I started with 21, but it turns out you lose WW points as you slim down. Unfair!) We can eat a few meals out on the weekend because I save up my weekly "splurge" points, and even then, I really try to limit the portion sizes (kid's meals or sharing meals often works). I have simplified cooking at home so that it's now much easier, and I have several meals that can be put together in about 15 minutes or even less. I cook extra so that we have leftovers for lunches, and we usually have leftovers for dinner a couple of nights a week as well. It's going really well, but I still like eating out. I guess that's just one of those things where I will always have to limit myself.

And all of this cooking at home hasn't really helped Jake's eating habits. Since I wait to eat dinner with Chris after he gets home, we usually don't eat until after we put the boys down for bed. So yes, I make a separate meal for my picky eater every night, which is almost always chicken nuggets, macaroni and cheese, bean and cheese burritos, or pepperoni pizza. And yes, that's a topic for a whole other blog.

Find a hobby: Nope, haven't done this one. I'm enjoying this blogging thing, but I don't really stick with it regularly enough to call it a hobby. I read a book (Pride and Prejudice). (BTW, I found it to be quite like a Harlequin romance novel where bickering=foreplay. But then, just when you think it's all going to pay off, there's NO steamy sex scene and the book is over. I felt a little robbed. And actually, I read two books, if you count Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems, which by the way, I haven't solved at all. But again, that's a whole other blog.) I love reading books; I always have. But my problem is that once I pick up a book, I find it very hard to put back down until I've read it all the way through. I could never understand people that read several books simultaneously. Don't you want to know how the first one ends? Don't you get so wrapped up in the characters and their lives that you find everything else in your life a distraction? No? Well, I guess that's just me. So, I don't think reading is the best hobby for me, unless it's okay for me to totally ignore my kids and my husband. Maybe I should take some kind of class- photography or karate or something. I'll have to think on this one.

Spend less at Target: Yeah, I'm not so sure why I set this as a goal in the first place. I don't think of myself as a crazy big spender. I don't like clutter, so I don't buy that much stuff. But I think I have bought slightly less over the last few months, so I guess that's good. But I really would like to lose these last few pounds so that I can go shopping for new clothes. I know I really need to go through my closet first and see what works and what doesn't, but that doesn't sound nearly as fun as a shopping spree.

Improve the world (volunteer): Yeah, I helped with a fundraiser at Jake's preschool, and we raised about $5000, which will go towards updating and beautifying the art studio. Yeah, Jake and I cleaned up an alley in our neighborhood. But that doesn't seem like quite enough.

-Did you know that World Blood Donor Day is on June 14th? Did you know that about 9% of Americans donate blood annually, and that if that number increased by just one percentage, it would be enough to end all national blood shortages in the foreseeable future? If interested in participating on June 14th (or any other day), you can schedule a donation through Red Cross.

-Did you know that Heal the Bay organizes beach clean-up events on the third Saturday of every month? I haven't made it to one yet, but does anyone want to join me on June 19th in Playa Del Rey?

-Did you know that there's this really cool organization called Kiva that works to connect people, through lending, to help alleviate poverty worldwide? You can choose the person you would like to loan money to, and give as little as $25. The repayment rate is over 98%, and when you get your money back, you can choose to loan it to someone else or cash out. We recently invested in Ernestina Sequeira Morales, a grandmother and janitor in Nicaragua who is trying to make improvements to her roof before the rainy season, so that her grandaughter (who lives with her) can "grow up in a pleasant atmosphere".

-Did you know that "kitten season" has begun? This is the time of year when there is an overabundance of stray kittens brought into local animal shelters, where they just don't have enough space or staff to care for them all. The sad part is, if these kittens could just be cared for until they are old enough to be adopted out, the majority could be placed with families who want them. Rescue groups help with some of these animals, but our also rely on individual volunteers to take in these animals temporarily. They'll provide you with food, vaccinations, etc. You just care for the animal(s) in your own home until they are old enough to be adopted out at 8 weeks. If there's any way that you can help out during this busy kitten season, please consider fostering an animal. If you have pets, please spay or neuter them. If you're thinking about getting a new pet, please consider your local animal shelter. And you can also help by donating towels, blankets and newspaper to your local shelter. Okay, back to my list now (since I will have to spend some time convincing Chris that we are ready for kittens again)...

Use reusable bags: I was already doing okay with this one, and I've made an effort to do even better. It's not perfect, but I'm trying. Did you know...

-Each year, 6 billion plastic carryout bags are consumed in LA County (600 bags per person per year).
-The US uses 12 million barrels of oil per year on the manufacture of plastic bags.
-It may take up to 1,000 years for a plastic bag to break down in a landfill, but even more alarming: Plastic bags are not really biodegradable. They actually go through a process called photodegradation—breaking down into smaller and smaller toxic particles that contaminate both soil and water, and end up entering the food chain when animals accidentally ingest them.
-In LA, public agencies spend tens of millions of dollars each year on litter prevention, enforcement and clean up. Plastic bags contribute greatly to this problem.

After my previous post, I had a couple of people tell me that they reuse their plastic grocery bags as trash liners, or to pick up their dog waste. And I've definitely done that. But that doesn't change the fact that they end up in the landfill, and eventually contaminating our soil and water. And there are better alternatives, like biodegradeable BioBags. I have to admit, I haven't tried these, and I have been using plastic trash bags to line the kitchen trashcan . But it's on my list to check out the alternative options at Whole Foods today. I know Seventh Generation makes recycled trash bags, which is at least better than creating a whole new bag for that purpose.

While we're on this topic, we should all use refillable bottles instead of disposable plastic water bottles, and bring our refillable mugs when we head to Starbucks. By the way, I don't claim to be anywhere near perfect, but I'm trying. I have friends that compost a lot of their waste, but I'm just not ready for that yet (I should, though). Yes, I still use paper towels and ziploc bags, but less than I used to. Oh, and I don't want to gross out anyone, but I really like my DivaCup, and the fact that I'm not adding tampons to the landfill. But I'm seriously digressing from my list today...

Spend less time on the computer: This one really hasn't been happening. Umm, you think that this blogging thing happens quickly? Nope, there's a lot more computer time right there. And I still check my email, like every five seconds. But I have gotten better about turning off my computer at night, and not looking at my phone. You know, unless I have actual work that needs to be done. Like blogging.

Stop reading emails, etc. while driving: I don't even want to talk about this one. Maybe I should turn off my phone before I get in the car. Okay, maybe I do need to talk about it. I LIKE feeling like I'm multitasking, and not "wasting" my time while driving. It's not safe, I know that, and it needs to stop. Maybe I should consider listening to books on tape or find some cd's that will teach me Spanish in the car. Or sing songs with the kids or something.

Let Chris know that I appreciate him: I really suck at this. If anyone has any great ideas, I could sure use some suggestions about how to be more complimentary and less critical. And actually, our 11th anniversary is coming up in a couple of weeks, so thoughts on that would be great, too. :-)

Keep my car clean: Inside, yes. Outside, no. I am regularly cleaning out all of the crap that used to accumulate in my car, which is great. But I still let the kids snack in the car, so the backseat is still pretty gross. And I haven't gone to the car wash much, which is why it's not being vaccuumed often, and the outside is covered in tree sap and bird poop. I know, I should just wash the car at home, which would give me some exercise at the same time.

Okay, so there's my list. And my accountability. Can I really change the things I don't like about my life in a year? Almost three months in, and I think I'm at least on the right track...

Chris lost about 20 pounds without hardly trying.

2010-05-21T09:56:00.001-07:00

It doesn't seem fair. I mean, I'm happy for him. He looks good, and I'm sure it's healthier for him. He did a trial of Weight Watchers, and his daily points allottment is like 65% higher than mine. And does he use those extra points to eat healthy food? Not unless you count muffins and lattes as healthy food.

I pack him lunch just about every day, and I literally give him almost twice as much food as I get to eat. He gets snacks! And when we eat dinner, he can have seconds! And he doesn't even count his points on a daily basis. I'm trying to be supportive, but sometimes life just isn't fair.

Eco-Friendly but Patience-Testing: The Trials and Tribulations of Using Reusable Bags

2010-05-18T09:18:00.000-07:00

Do you use reusable bags when shopping? Always? I think I generally do a good job, or at least I have good intentions. I have my nylon BAGGU bags, which I love because the fold up so neatly in their little pouch in my purse, so I almost always have them with me. And they're pretty big once they're unfolded, so they hold quite a bit, and they're sturdy and machine-washable. As it is time to pay for my purchases, they're right there in my purse when I go to pay, so it's not like I forget them. So what's the problem?

The problem is this: in their rush to keep the lines moving and check me out quickly, the clerks at the grocery store or Target don't want to be hassled with using my bags, because it's quicker and easier (and a habit) for them to use theirs. I have found that I need to place the bags on checkout counter before I place anything that I want to purchase there. And tell the clerk that they are my reusable bags. And make sure to unfold them. And give them at least twice as many bags as I think they should reasonably need.

The other day, I was at Target buying some miscellaneous stuff. Mostly groceries, plus laundry detergent. (Yes, our Targets all have grocery stores now, isn't that convenient?) I put my three reusable bags on the conveyor, then my fruit platter, laundry detergent, two bottles of juice, etc. First, the checkout person started to put the fruit into a plastic bag, and I said, "That's okay, it can just go in one of my bags." Then she put the liquid laundry detergent (which has its own handle, mind you) into a plastic bag, so I took it out, handed the plastic bag back to her, and just the detergent directly in the cart. Then the granola bars and other random stuff went into one of my bags (yay!), and then the juice she started to DOUBLE bag in plastic bags. At which point I said, "No, REALLY, I don't want ANY plastic bags."

Perhaps I should just bag my own stuff, you say? Perhaps I should, but I was also trying to pay and keep Brody from screaming. And at the grocery store, I do often use the self-checkout, but I find that it takes about twice as long because I have to wait for the other people who often can't seem to figure out what they're doing to finish up in front of me. And then it's my turn to look like I don't know what I'm doing as I try to use my reusable bags and the self-checkout register keeps telling me that I need to remove them from the bagging area and rescan them, because the register thinks I'm trying to steal something I didn't pay for. So I have to wait for the attendant, who is busy attending everything except people using the self-checkout registers.

All of this just to avoid accumulating more paper or plastic bags. Saving the earth is a lot of work.

Operation Clean Up

2010-05-13T18:19:00.000-07:00

We filled up two big black trash bags. And I'm using the word "we" fairly loosely here.

I dropped off baby Brody at a friend's house yesterday afternoon, and picked Jake up from preschool right after nap (his, not mine; I don't get naps). I had to bribe him with a Slurpee to get him to leave school before closing circle, but he came without too much protest, and picked out a cherry-orange combo at 7-Eleven. We went home and armed ourselves with gloves, brooms and a dustpan, and set out for the alley a half a block from our house. I should have taken before and after pictures of the alley, but of course this idea didn't occur to me until we were well into the clean up process, so you wouldn't have gotten the full effect, and besides, I didn't bring my camera anyhow. But here's a pic of Jake in his fabulous gloves.

Jake had a lot of thoughts about how all the trash had gotten into the alleyway in the first place, and what was going to keep it from coming back again in the future. In the end, he thought the most plausible reason for the trash was that the people who used the alley must not know where to find a trashcan to throw away their stuff. "Christy," he told me (I have no idea why he no longer calls me mom, but we're on a first-name basis now), "I think the people must be too tired to carry their trash all the way through the alley, and so they drop it while they're walking. Maybe if there was a trashcan at the beginning of the alley, they wouldn't have to carry it so far."

Sounded logical enough to me, but I pointed out that there are two sides to the alley, so people could enter from either place, depending on which direction they were headed. Jake of course decided this meant that we needed two garbage cans. Somehow, I talked him down to one, which we could place in the middle of the alley. I'm pretty sure that he was still worried that people wouldn't be able to hold their trash until they got to the middle, but I pointed out that they would be able to see the trash can from each side, since it would be at the corner of the 90-degree turn. And maybe seeing the garbage can up ahead would be enough motivation for them to hang on to their waste just a little bit longer. So yes, we also brought along a trash can with a lid to leave in the alley. Which I guess I am now responsible for checking and emptying on a regular basis?

Jake tried sweeping up the trash, but the big broom was difficult to maneuver. He tried picking up trash with the dustpan, but found it hard to scoop up more than one piece at a time. He tried pulling weeds, but pulled so hard that he fell back onto his bottom. He tried picking up the trash with his gloved hands, but, well, it just wasn't fun. And this reminded him of the fun he was missing by not being at school. "Christy, I bet all the friends at school are waking up from nap and saying, 'Where's Jake? Why isn't he here to play with us?'" So, it was my fault that not only was Jake missing out on the fun he could have been having at school, but I was also making the friends at school sad because they wouldn't get the chance to play with Jake.

I found out that the alleyway does get some use, by people other than us. We saw one family walk through while we were on our way there. Another man walked by in the other direction, just as we were about to get started. And one lady walked through while we were in the midst of Operation Clean Up. (It occurs to me now, that if I had described this to Jake as more of a tactical mission à la The Penguins of Madagascar, then maybe there would have been slightly less complaining. Probably not, though.) The lady politely asked us why we were cleaning (were we affiliated with the nearby church?), and nicely thanked us for the job we were doing. Jake noticed after she had gone, "She was able to carry her trash the whole way through without dropping it." I guess she wasn't as tired as some of the other people Jake imagined to be passing through.

As you may have guessed, the afternoon involved a lot of talking (on Jake's part), and a lot of trash collecting/sweeping/weed pulling (on my part). In the end, I think we did a fairly descent job. I left behind a few small weeds (some of them really were difficult to pull out of the cracks along the sidewalk). I'm sure I missed a few small pieces of broken glass (the broom doesn't work so well over the really uneven sidewalk). And there were a few large glass bottles stuck behind a utility pole that I couldn't figure out how to remove without breaking the bottles (I still have no idea how they got wedged in there in the first place). But, we did remove two large bags that were literally bursting with trash. And we left behind a trash receptacle, the effectiveness of which remains to be seen. I felt pretty proud of what Jake and I accomplished together.

Jake also seemed pretty proud, too, when he told his dad about what we had done later. "But, Christy," Jake asked me, "Next time you decide to clean up the alley, can you not invite me?"

The Path to Improvement

2010-05-10T09:41:00.000-07:00

There's this walkway (alley? path?) near my house. It goes from the neighborhood to La Tijera Blvd., and is the perfect shortcut to get to The Coffee Co. It's situated between two houses, then you make a sharp right turn, then a left, and it brings you out right next to the church. And it's disgusting. Sometimes smells like urine, full of trash and weeds. When Mark lived here, we used to joke that as you turned that blind corner, you needed to be ready for anything, because you never knew who/what you might run into in there. And actually, I've never run into anyone; I'm not even sure that anyone else actually uses this path. Maybe all the disgusting stuff just blew in with the wind and got stuck. Or maybe it's all been there for the last 10 years, because nobody has bothered to clean it out.

I would like to clean up this pathway. Actually, Jake is the one that suggested it. As we were walking along it one day, I said something about how gross it was. And Jake asked why the people who owned it haven't cleaned up their trash. As I tried to explain that nobody really "owned" it, I realized that in fact, we all kind of own it, especially those of us who use it. Since then, each time we walk through, Jake reminds me that we need to come back and clean it up. And each time I think about how he's right, but wonder about the logistics of it. I mean, it's disgusting, and I don't want to be touching the trash, and I certainly don't want Jake to. And what am I supposed to do with Brody? He's not just going to sit happily in his stroller and watch, and I can't do it while he's running around in the mess. And even if I figure out the logistics, will picking up the trash really make a big difference? It's not suddenly going to be a beautiful alley just because the paper cups and food wrappers are gone. I don't have any special talents to paint a mural along the wall, and even if I did, who's to say that it won't be covered with graffiti before long? And really, how long will it take before the weeds grow back and there's more trash?

But these are the same reasons that all of us struggle with volunteering our time, money or efforts to fix the problems in the world. There's not enough time, and it's too hard to figure out the logistics. What difference can I really make, and will it last? And I know that the answer is, if we all do something, even a little, it adds up, and we keep on working towards our goal. And that's the reason that I need to start somewhere, even if it's just a small, little-used alley near my home. Because I know it will make a difference to at least one person, and that's my son.

Dreams of Orange Chicken

2010-04-29T11:15:00.000-07:00

Man, I'm slacking on my posts lately.

I have about five more pounds to go on this diet (and then I will have the perfect body I've always wanted, right? Haha, only if my stomach suddenly becomes flat and my hips and butt fall off). But all I can think about is food...
...Chipotle chips and guacamole
...Panda Express orange chicken
...El Pollo Loco twice grilled burrito

I'm hungry, and I'm tired of eating healthy "filling foods" like lettuce and baby carrots. And I know that I'll stick with it, because jeez, I'm so close already. And tomorrow is my weigh-in day, and then the weekend, when I allow myself to use a few extra "splurge" points. So, I'll make it work, but man am I irritable right now. It's a good thing that Jake and Chris aren't around for me to snap at them (sorry, Brody, you're stuck with me). I think it's time to leave the house and go for a walk. Maybe to the grocery store, where I can drool over ice cream.

If you think touring, applying, and interviewing at schools is hard, just wait until you get accepted...

2010-04-15T11:27:00.000-07:00

Okay, time for another long one...

We got accepted to our first choice school! Yep, one of the private schools that originally wait-listed us called while we were on vacation. They even hand-delivered the enrollment packet to our house so that it would be waiting for us when we returned. And thus began three of the most stressful days of my life.

Day One: I called, and said that the offer did not mention anything about our financial aid application, and the contract deadline is tomorrow. Can we have more time to think about this and figure out our finances? Their answer: We can give you a (relatively small) tuition discount and 'til the end of the week. I said I needed to think about it, and they called back at 7:30pm to ask what kind of discount we would need to make it work. Wow, I wasn't expecting that! So I told them I would call back tomorrow. The idea of trying to negotiate the cost for my son's future made me kind of sick to my stomach, but I needed to talk to Chris to figure out what we could really afford.

Day Two: I called, and told them the amount that we were requesting. I did not expect them to grant it, considering it was four times their original offer. They told me that I needed to give some more info to their financial aid department and they would get back to me. They called back near the end of the day with their answer: YES! Oh my god, I was giddy. I never thought they would say yes, but they took into account the fact that I am not really working right now due to almost all of my hours being cut, and were willing to give us a really great tuition discount. Well, giddy, but also nauseous. I mean, it was a great offer, but it was still a significant amount of money that we would be paying. With no guarantee that we would be able to secure the same kind of discount in future years. Not to mention that it wouldn't really leave room in our finances to eventually send Brody to preschool, or private elementary school after that. But, we got what we asked for, and we told them we were ready to commit. They emailed me the written agreement that evening.

But when I looked at the new contract that night, it wasn't what I was expecting. Yes, the discount we talked about was on there, but so were some new fees that weren't included in the original contract. The New Family Enrollment fee and the Extended Payment Service Charge stated "Waived" on the first contract, but were added back in on the new amendment. And these weren't small fees; they amounted to more than 11% of the total tuition and fees. Convinced that they made a clerical error that would easily be corrected, I sent an email with a copy of the original contract attached, and told them I would await their response.

Day Three (note that this back-and-forth happened over the course of the entire day):
Their response: Oops we sent the wrong contract initially. You were given the sibling enrollment contract, but should have gotten the new family contract. Those fees should never have been waived.
My response: I understand, but we were not anticipating those fees when we told you what we would need to make it work.
Their response: We can't waive those fees because it wouldn't be fair to the other families. You can restructure your payments to pay more upfront, and lower your monthly payments. Besides, they are just one-time fees, and you won't pay them again in future years.
My response: If you can't waive those fees, can we revisit the tuition discount that we discussed? And, you originally told us we have until the end of the week, but this amendment says tomorrow.
Their response: Our last offer is the best that we can do. And part of that offer included us requiring an earlier response, which is why the deadline was changed. We are also talking with other families, and if you do not accept the offer, we need to call the next person on the waitlist ASAP.
My response: I see. I will need to discuss this with Chris because it was not what we were expecting. I will call you tomorrow.
Their response: I was really hoping for an answer today.
My response: WHAT THE F***!?!

Okay, of course that wasn't really my response, at least not aloud. But I have a feeling that she heard me, anyhow. Man, I NEVER thought that trying to enroll in a private elementary school would be such a stressful negotiation process.

So what did we do? We went back and forth about a dozen times:
+We love the school, and if the cost was the same for all of the schools we applied to, we wouldn't think twice about accepting.
-But the tuition would mean that I would definitely need to work, at least part-time. Maybe full time in the not-so-distant future, depending on what kind of financial aid they would offer in subsequent years.
+But we wouldn't have to worry about finding a middle school (even scarier than elementary options in the public school), since this one goes through 8th grade.
-But we would still have to figure out high school, which is even more expensive than elementary/middle schools if we go the private school route.
+But we wouldn't have to worry about all of those horrendous budget cuts that are seriously impacting all of our public schools, increasing elementary class sizes (some already at 26-30 kids with one teacher, no aides), cutting "extras" like P.E., music, arts, and even social studies.
-But how could we really afford it? I mean, even with this great discount they were offering us in tuition, if we stayed with this school all the way through 8th grade, for both of our kids (and there were never any tuition increases), we would be paying over $200,000! Not including the fundraising donations we would still be expected to give, fieldtrip fees, books, etc.

So, as you've probably guessed, we turned them down. And how do I feel? Disappointed. I really did think that the school would be a great match for our family, as their philosophy and values really seemed in sync with what we wanted. A little angry. They made a mistake, but decided not to honor what they originally wrote, and then added the extra pressure of making us decide sooner. A little worried. We still don't know for sure what our other options will be. But even more so, I feel kind of relieved. The monetary commitment was stressing me out. This leaves us a lot more flexibility to do different things with our life, like take a vacation or buy a new car. I still don't know for sure what's in store for us as far as schooling goes, but Jake is a bright kid, and he's going to be successful wherever we choose. Now, let's just hope we get in someplace good.

Thank you for being a friend...

2010-04-15T10:04:00.000-07:00

"I'm addicted to your blog." Pretty much the nicest thing someone can say to me! Thanks everyone, for all of your support. It's nice to know that people can relate. I don't mean for every post to be a bitch-fest, but as I think everyone has already figured out, this is my own form of therapy. It helps me to process my way through some of the things that are taking up space in my thoughts, my worries. And it helps me to be honest with myself about what I'm really feeling and thinking.

Right now, I'm thinking that I still have 10 pounds to go to meet my weight loss goal, and I need to make a trip to the grocery store. Time to look around for some new healthy recipes! Send them this way if you haven't already. :)

Yum, fried donuts covered in powdered sugar...

2010-04-12T10:21:00.000-07:00

And I almost forgot, Happy Birthday to my husband! Chris turned 39 during our vacation. Holy cow, never thought we'd be getting this old (although I have a ways to go before I'm quite that old). When I asked Jake if he knew what comes after 39, he said, "I don't know, you die?" When I told him no, he said, "A googolplex?" So, here's my husband, enjoying his beignets, on the verge of turning a googolplex...

Post-Vacation Blues

2010-04-12T10:07:00.000-07:00

Do I only write when I have something to complain about? Let's see if I can make this a little more positive...

We spent the last week in Orlando, Florida, enjoying lots and lots of time at Walt Disney World. Visited the four theme parks on four separate days (Animal Kingdom, Epcot, Magic Kingdom and Hollywood Studios). And in between, several trips to Downtown Disney and the Water Park at our reosrt (complete with water slides, kiddie pool play area and lazy river). Oh, and Chris visited the Kennedy Space Center. Pretty much the most exhausting vacation I can imagine, but we had so much fun. Jake loved playing with his cousins, Brody said "Wow!" at almost every new thing that he saw, Chris got to eat beignets, and we all got to spend cherished time with my family.

Speaking of beignets, spending a week on vacation (and eating food from theme parks) is not easily compatible with weight loss goals. But, I am content with the fact that I only gained back one of the ten pounds I had lost. Walking and pushing a stroller a thousand miles a day probably helps.

So, why the post-vacation blues? Could be that we didn't get home until almost 11pm on Saturday (2am Orlando time), and Jake has not slept well since getting back. (Brody also continues to wake up during the night, but that's nothing unusual for him.) Could be that Jake vomitted all over the bathroom Sunday morning, although he doesn't seem sick other than that and general crankiness. And today was a very rare moment when he said he didn't want to go to school, but I think that's just his own reluctance to leave vacation behind. He even labeled Saturday as "Sad Sadurday" because he didn't want to go back home. Or, more likely, my own blues come from the messy house, piles of laundry, bills to pay, etc. And this is after we spent most of yesterday unpacking and trying to clean up. Yep, it's just Mondays that stink, with the long list of things that need to be done and the next weekend so far away... When's my next vacation?

Magnets and Charters and Immersion, Oh My!

2010-03-31T22:20:00.000-07:00

This fall, Jake will start kindergarten. Yep, he's turning five this summer and is so ready. And I'm so ready for him to go (although I'm sure I'll cry like a baby on the day that it actually happens). So, how does this work? I mean, I just walk right up to my local neighborhood school and sign him up, right? Hahaha, not in Los Angeles. Here we have intradistrict permits, interdistrict permits, magnets, charters, and private schools to choose between. It's a lot to navigate.

I suppose there are a few lucky people that actually like their neighborhood school, and would feel comfortable sending their child there. Even some people that live in the Los Angeles Unified School School District. I am not one of them. I tried to give our school the benefit of the doubt, I really did. I had heard rumors about problems with our schools in Westchester, including bullying and even gangs. And I knew that our local "neighborhood" school is a Title I school, meaning that a large percentage of the children come from low-income families. 56%qualify for free or reduced lunch- and the assumption goes, the less monetary resources parents have, the less likely they are to be involved in their child's school. And I knew that the population of students at our school is mostly Black or Hispanic, with only 11% Caucasian students (which is not respresentative of Los Angeles as a whole, or our neighborhood in particular, meaning that kids are being bused in). And of course, I looked up the school's test scores, and noted an Academic Performance Index (API) of 795 out of 1000, making it the lowest of the five elementary schools in my immediate area (although better than our future middle school with an API of 743, and high school at 629). But I didn't want to make any assumptions. After all, being a Title I school means that you qualify for additional federal funding. And with the budget crisis in California, any school could benefit from some extra funds.

So, I toured the school. And everyone was nice, but I was so disappointed. The school did in fact receive additional funds, which they used to build a computer room for parents of the enrolled kids. Although, my tour guide told me, it wasn't well-used. A nice try, maybe, but I would have preferred something from which my child would directly benefit. And they were very proud that they had received a grant to start a gardening program at the school, which set aside a small plot for each classroom. I am all for teaching my child about nutrition, and the life cycle of plants, etc., but noticed that most of the plots were empty. My tour guide's response was something along the line that some of the teachers weren't ready for the extra work of integrating that into the curriculum. But, she said, there were a few teachers that were so into it, that they "borrowed" plots from the others that weren't using theirs. Which meant that even fewer teachers were taking advantage of this learning opportunity than it originally appeared. When I asked about parent involvement, I was told that they welcome parent volunteers, but that most parents don't really have the time. I think that was what sealed it for me; it was time to move on.

Since then, I've toured numerous other schools, most of them with Chris. We've seen public school options in our district. We've seen charters and magnets. We've checked out the language immersion programs in nearby districts. And we've toured private schools. And I learned quite a few things. I learned that most of the public schools in local school districts use what I consider a "traditional" educational approach. What I mean is, the focus is highly academic and behavioral, with teacher-led instruction, textbooks, cookie-cutter projects, and worksheets with "right or wrong" answers. And I'm not saying that's all bad, and actually I know that was how school was taught when I went. But I also saw the other side of what's out there. We found private schools (and a few public schools with lotteries to get in) that used an alternative approach, with a student-centered, hands-on, experiential, project-based learning. And it just made much more sense to me.

Maybe I should clarify. I think I'm a pretty intelligent, successful person. So apparently, a traditional educational approach worked well for me. And actually, I think Jake would be very successful in this type of program as well; he's a lot like me. But like every parent, I have much higher hopes for him; I think he can do better than me. I believe in the theory of multiple intelligences: that people can be "intelligent" in other areas besides just the traditionally measured skills of reading/writing and mathematics. Some people demonstrate strong visual-spatial skills, physical abilities, music/rhythm, interpersonal or intrapersonal skills. People may be born with strengths in a certain area, but that doesn't mean that such "intelligences" can't be developed, similar to how verbal-linguistic or logical-mathematical skills are taught in school. That is, maybe they can be taught in school, if you use a non-traditional approach. I think that Jake already demonstrates strong interpersonal skills, and frequently working in small classroom groups on various projects would continue to develop those skills. Jake enjoys the artistic projects that he completes in preschool; why can't those continue to be embedded in the curriculum, instead of just a weekly art lesson (at best) by a teacher that comes in for one hour and then leaves?

Here's something that I saw in every one of the "traditional" public schools that I toured: some kind of behavioral chart posted inside the classroom. One was a chart with each child's name, and popsicle sticks next to the names. If the child was "caught" doing something good, then he would get a stick. After a certain number, he could redeem them for a prize of some sort. For example, if the teacher saw him helping a friend on the playground, he would get a popsicle stick. So, wait, his motivation for helping people is to earn popsicle sticks? And this is only useful to do when an adult is watching? What happened to developing intrinsic motivation, or just feeling good about helping someone else to feel good? My "favorite" behavioral tool was a pocket chart that I saw in one classroom, labeled, "How am I doing today?" Each child's name was labeled below one of the pockets, and in each pocket, there were four cards: green, yellow, orange and red. Honestly, I may have forgotten the colors and their exact meaning, but depending on which color was showing, that was the indicator of how the child was behaving. Green: Good job. Yellow: Warning, watch your behavior. Orange: Needs to change. Red: A note is going home to your parents. Seriously, it was like terrorist alert levels, orange=high alert!

Last week, private school acceptance letters were mailed. Yep, we applied to three private schools. Yes, we pay ridiculous taxes here in California, some of which go to our public schools, and yet we're still considering spending over $20,000 per year to send our son to private school. Seriously. Actually, the most expensive one that we applied to would run us about $25,000 for a year of kindergarten. And that's not even including before/after school care, field trips, summer school, or the numerous fundraising efforts throughout the year. So, we also applied for financial aid. Because who can really afford that? I heard somewhere that if you have two or more kids and make less than $200,000 per year, you may qualify for financial aid. So we applied, and you know what we found out? It turns out that if you make a decent amount of money (not necessarily enough to be able to manage private school tuition), but you live within your means, you don't qualify for financial aid. What I'm wondering is, if we lived like many do in Los Angeles, in a house we can't really afford, with credit card debt and car payments due on our BMWs, then would we have qualified for financial aid? Or who does? Do I sound bitter? I don't mean to imply that there aren't people that genuinely deserve financial aid. And if the private schools really wanted to have the multicultural community that they all claim to strive for, then they would recruit children from different socioeconomic statuses, but I didn't see evidence of that.

Okay, maybe I am bitter. Our letters came. One acceptance. Two wait lists. Not a rejection per se, but more like, "You're not our first choice." After all of those tours, applications, interviews, screenings, open houses, etc. How could they not want us? It can't be Jake; he's a genius. No really, maybe genius is a bit strong, but he did great at the kindergarten screenings, at least at the two that we were allowed to observe. All the schools really did stress their goals of "diversity"; Chris says maybe we were waitlisted because he's a white male. But they had to admit some white males. Just not ours. At least, not in the first round.

So, here's my current situation. We have an acceptance from one school, no financial aid. And the only way we could afford to send Jake there would be for me to go back to work full-time. Which is not what I had planned to do at this stage in my children's lives. I want to be able to spend time at home with Brody while he's still little. I want to be able to volunteer time in Jake's classroom once he starts kindergarten. But I also don't know what our other options are at this point, because we most likely won't hear from our public school options until after the $2500 non-refundable private school tuition deposit is due.

Yes, we applied to several public schools. Eight, to be exact. Sounds excessive? Well, they're all lotteries, and our chances of getting accepted depend on the number of applications. We're only allowed to apply to one magnet school, and the one that we chose had 767 applications last year for 125 spots. That's a 16% chance of acceptance (or an 84% chance of rejection for one less optimistic than me). Actually, less than that since some people are almost automatically accepted because of sibling preferences. So, I figure, if we applied to eight public schools, that gives us 128% chance of being accepted somewhere. What, now you're questioning my mathematical skills? Must be that damned traditional public-school education that I received!

Some people would say, save your money for college, when it's really important where he goes to school. Or, Jake's a bright kid from a good family, don't worry. But I do worry. I worry about the safety and emotional well-being of my sweet, sensitive boy, especially with every report of school violence or bullying. I worry about him not enjoying school or not being challenged adequately in order to develop self-initiated, life-long learning skills. And I worry about not tapping into all of those things that he could have really excelled at, if only he was in the right environment with the right teachers and tools. And I worry about making the wrong decision, when there are so many choices and possibilities.

I don't know what the answer is. But for now, I wait to at least figure out our options.

Sleep is for the Weak

2010-03-24T08:33:00.000-07:00

"People who say that they sleep like a baby usually don't have one."

Why is it that everyone else's kids seem to sleep better than mine? Wait, let me amend that, I should say everyone else's babies. My four year-old goes to bed just fine and generally sleeps through the night without an issue. Sure, he's always asking for an extra bedtime story, would prefer to skip naps entirely and would love for daddy to be in the room until he falls asleep, but still, he can do it. But it wasn't always this way...

When Jake was a baby, I read all of the books about sleep that I could get my hands on. I generally spent about 12 hours a day with him attached to my breast, so reading was one of the things I could do meanwhile. (Actually, I eventually became pretty good at doing lots of things while he was nursing; I would be at work, typing on the computer, answering phone calls, etc. with him attached to my boob. The joys of motherhood.) With every book about sleep that I read, I'd feel inspired, and think yes, this is finally what is going to work to help him (and me) get the sleep that we both need.

Jake slept in a bassinette for the first seven weeks of his life. Well, if you call a string of napping stretches lasting about an hour on average "sleep", that is. I distinctly remember it was seven weeks, because at that point is when I had the thought, It's been 49 days since I last got more than two hours of sleep in a row. It was killing me. I am not a person that functions well without at least seven and a half hours of nighttime sleep in a row. I get cranky, irritable, bitchy even. So, at seven weeks, I decided that instead of waking up every one to two hours to nurse him (which seemed to be absolutely the only way to get him back to sleep), I would just pull him into bed with me and he could nurse while I slept. And it worked, sort of. I mean, I don't really believe anyone that says that they can co-sleep and they sleep right through the baby's nighttime nursings. Really, you don't notice when someone attaches himself to your nipple and starts sucking? I definitely noticed. I still woke up each time he woke up, but at least I could stick him on my breast without much effort and doze off while he was still nursing. I really think co-sleeping with my first child saved my life and my marriage, because there was no way I could have continued to function on so little sleep.

"May sleep envelop you as a bed sheet floating gently down, tickling your skin and removing every worry. Reminding you to consider only this moment."

So then, fast-forward to when Jake was about 11 months old. Have I mentioned that he was still attached to my breast? So attached that he absolutely wouldn't take a bottle, or a sippy cup, or anything else? He was eating solids well by then, but still liked to nurse every few hours, and that meant that I could never be away for him for more than a few hours. And 99% of the time, that was okay, since my job was flexible enough that he could come to work with me. But going out to dinner and a movie with my husband? It meant the baby was going to cry like he was being tortured, while some poor soul was babysitting. Okay, maybe it wasn't quite that bad, but I did feel guilty anytime I was away for more than a couple of hours.

So, it was around that time that we really started to push the bottle. It took awhile; we tried various nipples, bottles shaped like breasts, daddy giving the bottle when mommy wasn't around, etc. But what seemed to eventually work was giving him the bottle while holding him, bouncing gently on an exercise ball.

Oh, the exercise ball. I have so much resentment built up for that stupid ball. By then, that's what we were using to get Jake to sleep at night, for naps, everything. Before the exercise ball, I would either nurse him to sleep, or if that didn't work, Chris and I would take turns holding him, while quickly bending our knees and then straightening back up, "bouncing" up and down until he fell asleep. Man, it was a workout. So when I finally realized that I could sit on an exercise ball and bounce him to sleep with a lot less work, we switched to that.

Once Jake started taking a bottle, he totally refused the breast. And I was pretty okay with that. We made it almost a year of breastfeeding, and it was nice to finally feel like he wasn't entirely dependent upon me (and me alone). And of course, I thought this would be the miracle that would stop him from waking up all night long. I mean, if we weren't nursing anymore, there would be no need for him to sleep right next to me and wake up all night long to latch on, right?

Ha ha, that's me, the eternal optimist. Of course he continued to wake up all night long, except now I had no way to soothe him anymore! A bottle just doesn't work the same way. So it was time to transition our co-sleeping baby into his crib, in his own room, full-time for sleeping. As you can imagine, he didn't like it. You know what saved my life and our marriage this time? My husband. Hey, if I had to take care of the baby and nurse him every night for the first year of his life, it was his turn to be in charge for the second year.

"Sleep... Oh, how I loathe those little slices of death."

Somehow, Jake eventually learned to fall asleep without us bouncing on the exercise ball. Not before it slowly destroyed my back, as I fully attribute my herniated disc to that ball. Then with the transition to the "big boy" bed, it meant that Chris started falling asleep in bed next to Jake every night, waking up around the time that I was ready to go to bed, and eventually going back into Jake's bed sometime during the night when Jake would call out to him. They were back to co-sleeping, just this time in Jake's bed instead of ours. I'm not sure if Jake was two or three years old before that finally stopped being a regular occurrence.

So, you can imagine why it took us three and a half years before we were "ready" for a second child, since we didn't get the sleep issues solved before then. Besides, there are less opportunities for baby-making when you're not sharing a bed with your spouse.

My biggest worry about having a second child was the sleep deprivation. Could my marriage survive another round? But, I figured it had to be better the second time around. First, Jake had to be an anomaly; there's no way that a second child would have the same resistance to sleep that he did. And second, we knew what we were doing this time, so we should be able to do it better the second time around. Right? We would make sure that this one took a pacifier, and a bottle when needed. We would set up a consistent bedtime routine from the beginning and give him a lovey so that he would learn to comfort himself. He would sleep in the crib in his own room from fairly early on, and we wouldn't bring him into bed with us. We would put him down in his crib, drowsy but awake, so that he could learn to go to sleep without us. And we would never, ever pull out that damn exercise ball.

So, here we are, Brody is a year old, and we stuck to all of our plans for making him a great sleeper. And did it work? Hell no! Last night I completely lost count of how many times he woke up. And no, he doesn't use his lovey, suck on his pacifier, listen to the white noise machine and drift off back to sleep on his own. Someone needs to be there to pat his bottom, rock him or give him a bottle.

But the worst part isn't even the frequent night wakings. It's the hell of trying to get him to sleep lately. He fights it, with every bit of his energy, and the more exhausted he is, the harder he fights. We've tried moving his bedtime earlier, rocking him (while he squirms and yells), or putting him in his crib and staying with him until he finally falls asleep. And it's been taking 45 minutes to an hour to get him to sleep at night. I just don't know what to do anymore. Let him cry it out? I end up crying even more than he does. Not because I don't think it's fair to him (although in principle, I don't, but when you're desperate, you'll try anything), but because I get so frustrated, and then angry at him for not being able to go to sleep. And all I want to do is yell and scream, and I hate that I feel this way.

"The best bridge between despair and hope is a good night's sleep."

Maybe I just need to sleep on it.

How much filth can I accumulate in one day?

2010-03-22T08:44:00.000-07:00

How come when I step on the scale right before a shower, I always weigh more than I do immediately after the shower? I can be totally nude and do nothing except shower, and I'll find that I lost a pound afterwards, even though my hair is now wet. Do I really have that much dirt, sweat and grime that gets washed away? On a related note, I find that I might be obsessively weighing myself a little too often...

Hara Hachi Bu and Other BS

2010-03-15T22:59:00.000-07:00

I didn't quit Weight Watchers. I have to be totally honest, I never thought I would join any sort of weight loss program, so when I did the "free trial" for Weight Watchers a week ago, I never considered that I might actually decide to stick with it. But here I was at dinner tonight, using the mobile app on my iphone to calculate my points and decide whether or not I could have a second helping of soup, or how many croutons I could put in my salad. And the fact that I was doing this was exactly how I figured out that I can't quit yet.

Eat food. Not too much. Mostly Plants.

I lost four pounds. I don't mean for this blog to be all about weight loss, but this has kind of taken over my life this week. We've been eating at home, and fairly healthy meals, but I've found that the hardest part is cutting out snacking and practicing some serious portion control. The Okinawans say "hara hachi bu," which means eat until you feel 80% full. But I have no idea what that really means. Stuffed full? 80% not hungry? That's why I'm currently addicted to my points calculator; I need it to tell me when I'm done because I can't seem to figure out when I should stop on my own.

I was really proud of myself for managing to make every meal at home since we got back from San Diego, and decided we needed to celebrate with a grown-up date night. So Chris and I went out on Sunday for dinner and a movie. We went to Macaroni Grill and got two meals to share between us, the first a relatively healthy meal with grilled chicken and veggies, and the second a delicious pasta, loaded with creamy sauce. I thought it was kind of genius, actually, and got to enjoy some really yummy food while cutting my feelings of guilt in half. And actually, I didn't feel guilty at all since I had saved up all of my "weekly points" as a splurge, and still only went through about a quarter of what I was allotted. But I think Chris might have been happier if we had also gotten some popcorn at the movie theater.

I read Food Rules, an Eater's Manual by Michael Pollan and found it interesting, if not entirely helpful. The book is a collection of 64 rules of thumb related to what and how to eat. Here are a few of my favorites:

Eat food (plants, animals and fungi, not processed, food-like substances)
-Eat only foods that will eventually rot.
-If it came from a plant, eat it; if it was made in a plant, don't.
-It's not food if it arrived through the window of your car.

Mostly plants
-Eating what stands on one leg [mushrooms and plant foods] is better than eating what stands on two legs [fowl], which is better than eating what stands on four legs [cows, pigs and other mammals].
-Eat your colors.
-Don't eat breakfast cereals that change the color of the milk.
-Eat all the junk food you want, as long as you cook it yourself [think about french fries, potato chips, ice cream].

Not too much (slow down, moderate your eating and enjoying it more)
-Spend as much time eating the meal as it took to prepare it.
-Buy smaller plates and glasses.
-No snacks, no seconds, no sweets- except on days that begin with the letter S.

I don't know how much all of these rules and point calculations are really helping to create long-term success, but I do know that I am at least slowly developing a few healthy habits. And that's what this is all about, right?

Recipes for Success

2010-03-10T11:17:00.000-08:00

So, a couple of friends have sent me some recipes lately, and I wanted to say THANK YOU! If anyone else has a recipe that they would like to share for dinners (or any meal) that are YUMMY, EASY, and QUICK, please leave it in the comments or send me an email. :)

This was sent to me by my friend Carrie:

Chicken with Lemon, and Garlic

3 bone-in chicken breasts
Several cloves of garlic, whole, not peeled (the more, the merrier)
1 lemon cut in 4 pieces
Several sprigs of rosemary
Olive oil, and salt and pepper

Rinse chicken breasts and pat dry with paper towels. Rub a little olive oil on the chicken breasts and season with a little salt and pepper. I squeeze a little lemon juice over the chicken, not a lot. Then put the chicken, lemon pieces, garlic and rosemary into a 11 by 9 inch baking pan and cover with aluminum foil.

Bake at 375 for about 30 minutes, then remove foil and remove rosemary (it will burn if you leave it in). Then bake for another 10-15 minutes until browned and crispy. Chicken should be moist, but not pink if you cut into one, and juices should be clear.

Serve with garlic, you can squeeze the roasted garlic out of the peel and eat with the chicken, or put it on some bread with olive oil. Yummy! I serve this with a vegetable or salad.

And here's a link for Crockpot Chicken with Veggies (thanks, Shana!)

Addendum: I have to add one more recipe... a super delicious soup that Leora made us awhile back (except she left out the croutons and instead added a side of grilled mozzarella sandwiches, yummy!)...

Ribollita Light (from Sunset magazine, Jan 2009)
Serves about 4
3 Weight Watchers points per serving

3 TBSP olive oil (divided)
1/2 white onion, chopped
2 garlic cloves, minced
2 celery stalks, chopped into 1" pieces
2 medium carrots, chopped into 1/2" pieces
1-1/2 qts vegetable or chicken broth
1 can cannellini beans, drained & rinsed
4 whole canned tomatoes, quartered, plus some juice
2 cups rough chopped Swiss chard
4 C coarse bread, like French or Ciabatta, torn or cut to 1" pieces
Salt & pepper to taste
2 TBSP fresh cilantro, chopped
2 TBSP fresh basil, chopped
Parmesan cheese, grated for garnish

1. Heat 1TBSP olive oil and saute onion & garlic on medium heat 5 mins; add carrots and celery for 5 mins more.
2. Add broth and beans; simmer 15 mins
3. Add chard and tomatoes; simmer 15 mins
(Meanwhile, preheat oven to 350 deg; coat bread pieces with 2TBSP olive oil and sprinkle with salt. Toast 10-12 mins)
4. Add salt, pepper, basil & cilantro.
5. Serve soup with croutons and fresh grated parmesan

Let's Talk Solutions

2010-03-09T14:46:00.000-08:00

So, it's been a week since my first post, and I feel like I should talk about what kind of progress I've made. First, my attitude is better (yay!). The baby's still sick (in fact, I found out Wednesday morning that he has another ear infection, which explains why he was so miserable on his birthday). But at least now he's on antibiotics, so although he continues to wipe snot all over the place, he doesn't seem to feel as awful as last week. Today, as we were sitting on the floor, he wiped his nose on the bottom of my shirt. When I lifted it up to determine just how gross it was (bad enough that I need to change my shirt?), he realized that he could see my belly. Wow, fun, mommy's soft, squishy belly! What fun to climb on and squeeze! Look, I can blow raspberries on it! I can cover it back up and then uncover it again, peekaboo! We were both giggling and having a good time. Well, until he bit me, that is, and then I decided having a soft, squishy belly was not such a fun thing after all.

I joined Weight Watchers today. I got an email from Daily Candy that there was a special running until Saturday that I could join and save lots of money, and who can resist that? Well, I really only signed up for the one-week free trial, so I need to remember to cancel before midnight on Monday or else be charged something like $65. But I've been curious about their "points system", so I thought I'd check it out and see if it would be a helpful tool to get me to eat better. (Weight Watchers assigns every food a point value, and you are allotted a certain number of points per day, as well as some extra points for the week for special occasions.) As I was signing up, I was eating a Trader Joe's chicken pot pie, so I figured I'd plug that in and see my point total. I realized before I started that this wasn't the healthiest food choice, but I was still surprised to find out that I was in the process of consuming 17 of my 21 allotted points for the day! Yikes! Now, I have the option of eating "zero points" foods for most of the rest of the day (baby carrots and diet soda, anyone?), or I can accumulate "activity points" by going out and exercising. Wondering just how much exercise I would need to do in order to eat dinner, I decided to check out what going for a walk would earn me. Turns out, if I walk for 30 minutes at a regular pace, I earn one point. I think I need to walk for the next eight hours in order to eat tonight.

Okay, maybe eating healthier is still a little ways off for me. But I am trying to do a better job of at least eating at home (and no take out). I'm pretty certain that I have made more meals at home over the last week than I did in the entire last month. Which is especially impressive considering that we were away for the weekend, so I wasn't cooking anything at the hotel where we stayed. I'm still trying to get the hang of how I am supposed to cook dinner while tending to the baby and the preschooler, at approximately the same time that the baby needs to go down to bed. As I see it, I have two choices. One is to cook dinner earlier in the evening, eat with the kids, and then get them ready for bed. Chris would then eat by himself after he gets home. The other option (which is the one I've been doing), is to feed the kids their own meals first, get them ready for bed, and then cook after the baby is asleep, and eat with Chris after he puts the other one down for bed. But by then, I'm hungry, grumpy, and low on patience. I'm still not sure how to make this work.

I do have one success to share, though. My car is not full of crap! It's still not clean (I'm not going to the car wash when it's been raining every week). And it desperately needs to be vacuumed inside (dried peas and cheerios are everywhere). But other than that, there's nothing that doesn't belong in the car. And I created a system- a bag for trash, and a bag to put all the little stuff that gets collected each day (preschool artwork, baby toys, etc.), so that I can carry it all inside at once, and a notebook to write down all those things that I don't want to forget while in the car. It's helpful because I don't feel like I need to text someone or write an email immediately. And it turns out, if you just stop checking your email every two minutes, sometimes you even forget about it for a whole hour!

In case you were wondering, no, that number on the scale has not changed over the last week. I mentioned that we went away for the weekend. I actually thought that pushing a stroller around the zoo (man, that was a big hill!), swimming, and carrying the baby all around would have been more helpful. But those activity points didn't count for as much as I thought, and apparently it's hard to lose weight when you stuff yourself at Benihana, eat mac 'n cheese and chicken strips at the zoo, and drink lots and lots of coke.

Oh, and since we were away, Brody just would not nurse (too distracted by the new places), so he weaned himself from breastfeeding. Honestly, I was only aiming to do it for a year, so I was ready to be done, too. But I am feeling a little guilty that it happened while he's sick, and a tiny bit nostalgic since I plan for this to be my last baby. And now I'm thinking about those 200-500 calories per day that breastfeeding supposedly burns, and missing that, too. Time for some more walking...

This next week, I need to come up with a plan for cutting soda out of my diet, and making it to the gym. Wish me luck! I'd better go now, so that Brody and I can start our walk. Otherwise, I won't be able to eat dinner until midnight.

Just One More Thing

2010-03-03T21:13:00.000-08:00

Okay, I don't want to just list all of the problems without any solutions, but I realized something that I left off my list yesterday. My car is full of crap, and I never clean it out. I have a friend that I used to tease because her car always contained the most random stuff. Not just the usual sports gear, umbrellas, beach blanket kinda stuff. If you needed a new pair of pants (hey, when you work with kids, sometimes you get peed on), you could probably find some in her car. Or pretty much an entire new wardrobe. She used to tell me, "When you have kids, you'll understand." And I thought, "I doubt I will ever understand why you drive around with a blender and a sandwich maker in your trunk." But I think I sort of get it. When you have kids, you have more stuff, and it seems like you're always transporting it around. And when you get back home, your hands are never free to be able to carry all that stuff back inside and still be able to reach for your keys to unlock your door. Especially, I might add, if you're carrying a baby.

I took an inventory today of all the things in just the front of my car (driver's seat, passenger seat and floor):

1 t-shirt
1 toy car
1 half empty coke can
2 jackets
2 Toys R Us coupons
1 1/2 Gerber puffs
1 can of spray sunscreen
2 McDonald's toys
1 lip balm
2 crumpled receipts
1 sock
1 pair of tweezers
2 kid's artwork from preschool
1 broken bluetooth
1 formula dispenser
2 rocks (collected by the preschooler)
8 push pins
1 marble
1 baby spoon
1 bottle top
3 dirty Kleenex (yuck!)
1 toy spider

This doesn't even include the stuff that I would have found if I looked in the back of the car below the kids' seats or in the cargo area (dried peas and wet wipes, anyone?). So, I decided that I must add this to the list of things that I'd like to change. Tomorrow, I'll clean out my car and do my best to keep it that way on a daily basis.

How did today go? Well, I started thinking about solutions. Chris took the day off work to help out with the sick baby while I went to work. Significantly less stressful for me, and we made dinner at home. Not enough exercise, but no eating out or fast food. It was a decent start.

Confessions of an Eternal Optimist

2010-03-02T20:34:00.000-08:00

Warning: This is going to be long. As anyone who's ever read anything I've ever written can attest, I tend to be wordy.

Today marks the first birthday of my youngest son, Brody. He's grown and learned so much in this last year; he's now starting to walk and even says a few words. He's the cutest thing I have ever seen (don’t tell that to my oldest son). But today, he's miserable due to a bad cold. Runny nose, coughing, sneezing, and unable to sleep. And that means he's making me crazy. I love my baby, but I love him even more when he sleeps. Don't get me wrong, I feel bad for the little guy, but I start to lose patience when nothing I do makes him feel any better. He wants to be held; he wants to be put down. He wants to sleep; he won’t stay asleep. And all of the inconsolable crying really tests my patience. Then I start to get frustrated that I am unable to get anything checked off of my to-do list.

Things I accomplished by noon today:

-I got up.

-I got dressed.

-I packed my four year-old's lunch before sending him off to preschool.

-I sorted the laundry into piles.

I think that was about it. I tried to start washing the dishes, but had to stop to pick up the baby, who just wanted to be held. I tried to start washing the laundry, but had pretty much the same problem there, too. Because we had family and friends come by over the weekend to celebrate the birthday (luckily, before the kid got sick), the house looks like some sort of crazy disaster zone. It is littered with half-deflated balloons everywhere, and the usual minefield of toys strewn about the living room. I find it frustrating that it still looks this way on Tuesday.

Today being Brody's birthday also means it has been exactly one year since I have given birth to him. Perhaps stupidly, I decided it would be a good day to step on the scale. This is something that I have been avoiding for awhile now. First, I should clarify, I have never been a person to really worry about my weight. I don't diet, and I didn't even own a scale for the longest time. It's not that I am perfectly skinny, it's just that I like to think that weight is just a number, and not something to dwell on. I would rather focus on eating healthy foods or staying physically fit. But the sad fact is, even though it's just a number, the higher that number goes, the less likely I am to want to put on a swimsuit. So, how did the weigh-in go? Well, since it's just a number, I won't tell you the exact one. But let's just say that it's more than 20 pounds over what my driver's license says I weigh. If I'm being perfectly honest, even at the time of getting that license, I probably weighed about five pounds more than I said I did. And I currently weigh about five pounds more than I did last summer, when Brody was a few months old, which was about five pounds more than my pre-pregnancy weight, which was about five pounds more than my first pre-pregnancy weight (i.e. before Jake), which... Well, you get the idea, those pounds add up.

But I have excuses. I just had a baby! What, that was a year ago, you say? Well, I'm breastfeeding! What, that's supposed to burn extra calories? Not when you're hungry all the time and consume more calories than it burns. There's never any time for exercising! And the baby cries when I put him into childcare at the gym! And so on, and so on. But the real reason for the weight gain has taken me a year to figure out: I eat when I'm stressed. And babies stress me out. No, not your baby. I actually LOVE babies. There's a reason I work in pediatrics, after all. I can make them smile, giggle, laugh, feed them, change them, play with them. But then I give them back to their parents. With my kids, there's nobody to give them back to. Sure, I can hand the baby off to Chris when he gets home from work at almost eight o'clock at night. But that doesn't change the fact that I am really the one person that is responsible for this child all day, every day. I remember this with Jake, too, when he was a baby. However, I think I was a little less stressed then because at least we had family living nearby. But then my brother and sister-in-law moved back to Arizona. Now, I've got two kids, and no family within 400 miles from here. It's stressful. And I eat.

Why does my list of today's "accomplishments" stop at noon? Because that was about the time that my sad-eyed baby looked up at me, waved, and said, "Bye bye." Instead of choosing to believe that he was telling me to get lost, that he was done with me, I took that to mean that he wanted to get out of the house. He decided it was time for a change in scenery. I decided it was time for a change in my life. So, instead of being grateful for all of the wonderful things in my life (add that to my to-do list for another day), or reflecting back upon all the joys that this last year has brought me (and there are MANY), here's a list of things that I would like to change in my life:

-I don't like the way that I look in a swimsuit. No, it's not really about what the scale says, but they sure go hand-in-hand.

-I'm not physically fit. In fact, I felt worn out just cleaning the windows in preparation for our company this last weekend. I've never had a regular exercise regimen, but once upon a time, I used to go for walks, hikes, rollerblading, yoga, or the gym occasionally. And I know that my lack of physical fitness is related to the back problems that I have experienced since having kids. Actually, I blame the initial problem on bouncing baby Jake to sleep on an exercise ball every day for at least a year. But my lack of hamstring flexibility and core trunk strength doesn't help the back problems, either. I mean, as a physical therapist, I really should be more committed to an active physical lifestyle, right?

-I eat out too often. Well, that's not exactly true. We eat "in" quite often, but always pick up food to bring it home. To be totally honest, I probably only make something at home a handful of times each month (lunch or dinner). This I also blame on the kids, who demand a lot of attention in the evening hours when I should be preparing something for dinner. But really, it's a habit now, and who has time to plan meals, go shopping, cook and clean up afterwards?

-I eat too much fast food. This goes along with the one above, as eating out often leads to going through the drive thru. I hate that I am setting a bad example for my kids. I try to make sure that their meals always include fruits, vegetables and healthy grains. But I don't eat the same things they eat. What is that telling them?

-I don't have a special talent or hobby. My friends are writers, painters, runners, sculptors, photographers, readers. I've never considered myself to be a creative or talented person.

-I spend too much money at Target. I love Target; it's my favorite place to shop. But the problem is that I tend to think of Target as being so reasonably priced, that I can buy just about anything that I find on sale there. Which means that I end up buying too much "stuff" that I didn't really need. I really didn't need to spend that money, or create more clutter in my home and my life, for something that's just going to end up in the landfill eventually.

-I don't do things regularly to make the world a better place. I should volunteer to clean up trash along the beach, feed the homeless and help underprivileged kids, but I don't.

-I drink too much soda.

-I don't always use my re-useable bags.

-I spend too much time on the computer.

-I check my email and Facebook while driving. It's usually at red lights, but still, it's probably unnecessary since I just checked it five minutes ago, right before leaving the house.

-I don’t always tell my husband how much I appreciate him.

My brother thinks that (in general) I have unrealistically high expectations. I like to think of myself as an eternal optimist. I mean, I know I can't change everything overnight, but I can make changes, right? So, I am putting this out there now. This is my list, an inventory of things that I would like to change over the next year. My "New Year's Resolutions", created on the anniversary of my baby's birth. I will try to write about them regularly, if nothing else, just as a reminder to hold myself accountable. I know that I should frame it in terms of positive, measureable goals (i.e. instead of "Drink less soda", I should say, "I will drink eight glasses of water everyday", which will give me less opportunities to drink soda). But that's not how I work. Maybe someday I'll get around to writing actual goals, but for now, a list will have to suffice. Because that's what I'm good at.

So, where did Brody and I go when we left the house at noon? Well, it was lunchtime, so we went to Chipotle to eat, and then to Target. Hey, there was nothing yummy in the house, and I was just about out of laundry detergent. Change sometimes comes gradually. But, once we got home, we did go for a long walk and watched the airplanes. I didn't walk super fast or super far, but I was pushing the stroller, and walked long enough that I was tired and a little sweaty. And then I still had to turn around and walk back home. The people on the airplanes were going somewhere different, so why can't I? It's a start. We'll see where this goes.

I warned you ahead of time that this was going to be long. Oh yeah, and Happy Birthday, Brody. I hope you're feeling better very soon.